Category: Men of Steel

God’s Will and the Church

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The passage for this message is First Corinthians 12:12-14, 26.

We have been studying how to best experience God, not just to know God but to experience him. The seven realities of Henry Blackaby’s Experiencing God can change our perspective from a self-centered theology to one that is God-centered, understanding these profound truths:

1. God is always at work around us
2. God pursues a continual love relationship that is real and personal
3. God invites us to join him in his work
4. God speaks to us to reveal himself, his purposes and his ways
5. Having heard from God, we will experience a crisis of belief that requires faith and action
6. We will have to adjust our lives to join him in his work
7. We come to know God through experience as we obey him

It been challenging and this confronts us on a deep and personal level. These realities cause us to think about our current relationship with God and force us to admit that we have often been simply a casual fan of Jesus, but not a follower of Jesus at all, believing just enough to know that heaven is the place we want to go after this life, but not enough to make actual changes in our lives that will allow God to use us and make an impact on his kingdom. We believe the mission and purpose of God is to call out pastors, teachers and missionaries to build his kingdom, and we settle for sitting on the sidelines, never really wanting to get into the game. We are glad we “made the team” by saying YES to Jesus at some point in the past. We know there’s a playbook but have not really gotten it out to read it, or to prepare for the game, and we justify ourselves by saying, “I just sit here on the bench so I leave reading the playbook and running the plays to the starting team. I don’t expect to get in the game so I’m just fine sitting here on the bench, dressed out and wearing my team’s colors. I don’t really like practice too much: the coach is always telling us what to do and how to do it. He makes the team run, shoot, get in shape, hone our skills and get prepared for the games. But I don’t really DO all that stuff. I prefer just sitting over here on my little bench, next to this little orange water cooler filled with Gatorade. Why am I on this team? It’s because I like the crowd cheering for me and my team, knowing I can make it to the Final Four and the Championship Game because of all the dedication, commitment, skills and efforts of those five starters who get all the playing time.”

Wow, I didn’t think I would take this illustration so far, but the more I thought about it, how often is this the truth? My faith is all about ME. My faith is personal. But the Bible begs to differ. Faith is not something that we believe in or live out on our own. There is way too much evidence in Scripture that the Christian faith is to be carried out in the context of community. We often seek God’s will in our own lives but fail to realize that God has a will for the church. The church is the gathered group of Jesus followers. The church is people, those who have confessed allegiance to the One who bought them and saved them, not just to sit and soak, but to serve. I’m not talking about volunteering, although that is expected when we have a corporate mentality to Christianity. I’m talking about truly understanding what the church is all about. What does God expect of the church? Why do we gather in worship? Jesus mentioned that there are two great commandments: to love God, and then to love others. The whole law can be summed up in these two commands, but the Bible also has a lot to say about HOW we live as believers and followers and disciples of Jesus. Let’s first see what the church IS:

1. The Church is a Creation of Christ.

A. He builds the church: Matthew 16:18, I also say to you that you are Peter, and upon this rock I will build My church; and the gates of Hades will not overpower it.

B. He builds the church using Spirit-led pastors and leaders: Ephesians 4:11-13, And He gave some as apostles, and some as prophets, and some as evangelists, and some as pastors and teachers, 12 for the equipping of the saints for the work of service, to the building up of the body of Christ; 13 until we all attain to the unity of the faith, and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to a mature man, to the measure of the stature which belongs to the fullness of Christ.

C. He builds the church and arranges its members according to his own will: 1 Corinthians 12:18, But now God has placed the members, each one of them, in the body, just as He desired.

2. The Church is the Living Body of Christ with many Members; 1 Corinthians 12:27, Now you are Christ’s body, and individually members of it. It is not an organization as much as it is an organism; people make up this active and living body of Christ.

3. The Church is Uniquely Related to Jesus Christ as the Head of the Body;

  • Ephesians 1:22, And He put all things in subjection under His feet, and gave Him as head over all things to the church.
  • Ephesians 4:15-16, 15 but speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in all aspects into Him who is the head, even Christ, 16 from whom the whole body, being fitted and held together by what every joint supplies, according to the proper working of each individual part, causes the growth of the body for the building up of itself in love.

All matters of the church are to come under the lordship of Christ.

4. We (believers) are the Members of the Body of Christ who are Uniquely Related to Every Other Member of the Church; Ephesians 4:11-13, 11 And He gave some as apostles, and some as prophets, and some as evangelists, and some as pastors and teachers, 12 for the equipping of the saints for the work of service, to the building up of the body of Christ; 13 until we all attain to the unity of the faith, and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to a mature man, to the measure of the stature which belongs to the fullness of Christ.

5. The Church is on Mission with God in Carrying Out the Father’s Redemptive Plan;

The Great Commission: Matthew 28:18-20, 18 And Jesus came up and spoke to them, saying, “All authority has been given to Me in heaven and on earth. 19 Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit, 20 teaching them to observe all that I commanded you; and lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age.”

The Ministry of Reconciliation: 2 Corinthians 5:17-20, 17 Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come. 18 Now all these things are from God, who reconciled us to Himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation, 19 namely, that God was in Christ reconciling the world to Himself, not counting their trespasses against them, and He has committed to us the word of reconciliation. 20 Therefore, we are ambassadors for Christ, as though God were making an appeal through us; we beg you on behalf of Christ, be reconciled to God.

Wanting to Know God’s Will

We often desire to know God’s will for our lives, but remember, THAT is the wrong question. We need to ask, “What is God’s will?” rather “What is God’s will for my life?” Discover what God WILLS and align your life to what we know. Of those two questions, one is God-centered while the other is self-centered.

There IS something called “God’s will” and as individuals, we want to hear God speak, discover that will and then make major adjustments to be a part of God’s will. But God also has a will for the church, which is the gathered body of Christ. As the body of Christ, we want to hear God speak in order to discover his will, and then make major adjustments to be a part of God’s will.

So today, I want to focus on ONE aspect of what God’s will is for the church. It can be summed up in one word, ACCOUNTABILITY. Since we are NOT involved in an individualistic religion but rather a faith of interdependent relationships, what does God really want from us? How can the body of Christ best function? How can I be the best member that I can be, not only for myself but also for the church?

Accountability is not something that we can do alone, by reading the Bible more, praying more, tithing more… accountability is done in connection with other people. It’s more than just BEING WITH other people. Face it; there is no real accountability in a worship experience where we find ourselves looking at the back of another person’s head, sitting in rows like this. Real accountability takes place in the context of small groups, and it is only within a small group that lives intersect and believers grow, and help OTHERS to grow toward Christian maturity.

Accountability:

I want to spend the rest of my time building the case that Christianity is lived out in the context of small groups, and that the proof is found in a repeated phrase, “one another.” Let’s begin this lesson on the church by looking at ancient faith accountability:

In the Early Church:

  • Acts 2:47, Day by day continuing with one mind in the temple, and breaking bread from house to house, they were taking their meals together with gladness and sincerity of heart
  • Hebrews 3:13, But encourage one another day after day, as long as it is still called “Today,” so that none of you will be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin.
  • Hebrews 10:24-25, and let us consider how to stimulate one another to love and good deeds, 25not forsaking our own assembling together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another; and all the more as you see the day drawing near.

John Wesley and the Rules for Band-Societies

I did a little research on the Band-Societies of John Wesley (like a band of brothers). These were basically class meetings; this guideline was drawn up December 25, 1738.

The design of our meeting is, to obey that command of God, “Confess your faults to one another, and pray for one another, that you may be healed.”

To this end, we intend.

  1. To meet once a week, at the least.
  2. To come punctually at the hour appointed, without some extraordinary reason.
  3. To begin (those of us who are present) exactly at the hour, with singing or prayer.
  4. To each speak in order, freely and plainly, of the true spiritual condition of our souls, including the faults we have committed in thought, word, or deed, and the temptations we have felt, since our last meeting.
  5. To end every meeting with prayer suited to the spiritual condition of each person present.
  6. To each speak of his own spiritual condition first, and then to ask the rest, in order, probing questions regarding their spiritual condition, sins, and temptations.

Wow, these statements reveal that John Wesley had a passion for accountability in small groups. Remember that HE was the catalyst for a great spiritual awakening, speaking to hundreds of people at a time. Speaking to the crowds was not enough to live the Christian life.

Wesley was influenced by the Moravians, who were founded by John Huss. He was actually burned at the stake in 1415 for heresies against the doctrines of the Catholic Church. His teaching eventually influenced theology in the west, primarily in Europe, and it laid a foundation for a young Catholic monk named Martin Luther, who sparked the Protestant Reformation that began in 1517.

John Wesley described his small groups as “a company of men [and women] having the form of godliness, united in order to pray together, to receive the word of exhortation and to watch over one another in love, that they may help each other to work out their salvation” (The Book of Discipline pg.75).

You may be saying to yourself, “But I don’t like accountability in my spiritual life. It’s a private matter and I don’t want to talk about my journey and struggles and failures.” But does it not make sense to have all of our assets in place to increase the probability of our success in the Christian life? If we go it alone and fail miserably, why not have trusted, spiritual people around us to help us become mature in our faith and in our lifestyle and behavior?

Did you know that you CANNOT avoid accountability forever? Do you know why? Because…

Accountability is Inevitable: Romans 14:12 says, So then each one of us will give an account of himself to God.

Accountability is Anticipated: Hebrews 13:17 tells us to, obey your leaders and submit to them, for they keep watch over your souls as those who will give an account. Let them do this with joy and not with grief, for this would be unprofitable for you.

If accountability before God is inevitable and anticipated in the church, then it only stands to reason that it would be advantageous for us to keep short accounts HERE in this life (with the church) before we ultimately stand before God.

An accountability relationship involves giving permission to a group of fellow believers to ask and expect an honest answer to mutually agreed upon questions. It’s not me telling you that I’m going to hold YOU accountable.

There is a classic verse on accountability: found in Proverbs 27:17, As Iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.

Accountability isn’t a remedial class for wayward Christians; accountability is God’s way to achieve God’s very best for our lives. Who among us does not want to please God, by becoming the best Christian we can be, the best husband or wife, employee or employer, teacher, student, parent or child? Christian growth happens in community, in the context of small groups, accountability. We all need encouragement and instruction, guidance, warning, admonition, challenge, to build up… it doesn’t happen in the large corporate worship setting. Let me tell you why.

This public gathering has one purpose, to offer worship to God out of a grateful heart. We don’t come to worship for what WE get out of it, because if we do, worship becomes self-centered. No matter how inspiring the service might be, from music to message, it’s not about US. It is in the context of a small group where we live out our faith in a culture of accountability.

Since I have three other things to tell you, and have no time to do so, I am going to put these items on my blog, and here is what you can find there:

  1. What are some reasons why we need accountability?
  2. Why do people avoid accountability?
  3. Obedience (to God and His Word) is always a positive thing; so take a look at all the “One Another” statements in the New Testament and see how great God’s Will is.

The New Testament is filled with imperatives (commands that God expects us to obey). These imperatives instruct us how to interact with one another, and talk to one another. Our talk should include confession, prayers, exhortation (which are basically suggested “next steps” for someone to follow), words of comfort, rebuke, admonition (or warnings), and the list goes on. Check out the church website for more.

As I wrap up, maybe today is the day that you finally realize that simply attending worship is not God’s will for the church. As important as worship is in the life of a congregation, God has so much more planned for his children. He expects us to be a community of faith, interdependent with each other, under the lordship of Christ.

It is God’s will for his children to share life together for the mutual benefit of the body of Christ. Each member of the body has a function and if we don’t do what God desires for us, the whole body suffers. You have to seriously ask yourself, “Why does God have me in this place at this time in history? What function am I supposed to do at this church? Why has God brought me here?

Today is the day of salvation; it is the day of commitment and a day of making decisions to embrace God’s will for the church, his kingdom and your life. Please bow in reverence while I pray.

My Prayer: Father, we have read many passages from your Word this morning, we ask that your Holy Spirit remind us of what you have said, and convict us about how to live the Christian life as YOU have designed and intended according to your will. Amen.

The Joy of Restoration

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Restoration is a very powerful byproduct of a life well-lived in Christ. Define reconciliation and restoration in your own words. Sometimes we use them interchangeably, because being made right with God involves both words. Change that happens to a life is summed up in these two words.

  1. Describe how you came to know Christ.
    1. What was your life like before you received Christ?
    2. How did your salvation story happen?
    3. What is your life like now that you have Christ?
  2. Put into words the feeling you have about forgiveness and the newness you have in Christ.

Video Questions:

  1. How is forgiveness a necessary step toward restoration?
  2. In what area of your life do you need to experience restoration or new birth?
  3. Standard definitions:
    1. Reconciliation: From the Greek meaning to change or exchange; literally to change in one’s relationship to God (from enemy to friend).
    2. Restoration: synonymous with renew, best described in David’s use in Psalm 51, to restore is to make right (after a sin against God). New birth can be described as restoration.

Bible Study: John 21:15-19

  1. Peter understood the concept of restoration. He was outspoken and said he would never deny Christ… but he did, and Jesus came to him and offered restoration.
  2. Jesus repeatedly asked Peter if he loved him (agape-unconditional God-like love) and Peter responded with phileo (a brotherly love). We wonder if Peter really understood the depth of Love that Jesus had for him.
  3. Peter affirmed the Lordship of Jesus (John 21:17) and that Jesus knows all things. The response ultimately is NOT in Peter’s response to Jesus but in God’s knowledge of Peter’s heart. The instruction is for Peter to do the work of a shepherd (feed, shepherd and tend his sheep).

Bible Study: John 21:1-4, 22

  1. Notice where Jesus encounters his disciples in this post-resurrection appearance. What are they doing?
  2. Peter had gone back to where he had started, on a boat doing what he was doing when Jesus first called him.
  3. When Jesus asked if Peter loved him more than these (John 21:15) he could have meant the FISH.
  4. Peter is concerned about what will happen to John (what about this guy?) but Jesus hammers on the call he cave to Peter, “You follow me.”

Bible Study: Acts 2:36

  1. Peter goes from a denying, fearful man to a person with power and authority, and confidence.
  2. He is so different here than back in Mark 14:66-27.
  3. So, does Peter now appear affectionate toward Jesus (phileo) or passionately committed to him (agape)?
  4. How have you experienced God using you in light of being forgiven and restored?
  5. Restoration involves allowing God to do a work of renewal in our lives. Christ did the work of restoration by his work on the cross (2 Corinthians 5:18-20).
  6. Restoration takes time, and we may not see the lasting effects until we get to heaven. Where do you need to do the hard work of restoration in your life?

At the end of the film, we see Cindy’s redemption but Hannah does not. We are left to wonder whether the relationship ever went beyond the written note.

A Guide to Biblical Restoration: *

Failure among God’s people is nothing new; biblical history is filled with failure. Samson failed. Abraham failed. Solomon failed. Jonah failed. The Hebrews failed. All twelve of the disciples of Jesus failed; Even King David, who was a man after God’s own heart failed; “But the thing that David had done displeased the Lord” (2 Samuel 11:27). So all of these committed willful disobedient sin after having once pledged fidelity to God. In both Testaments, the evidence of failure is both overwhelming and sobering.

There is the overwhelming evidence that God is also in the restoration business. The Bible is the astonishing record of the God’s effort to reclaim and to restore those who are his, but who in a moment of weakness betrayed their allegiance to him. The potential for restoration plainly exists. In Galatians 6:1 we are told “Brethren, even if anyone is caught in any trespass, you who are spiritual, restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness; each one looking to yourself, so that you too will not be tempted.” Needless to say, there are verses that mention restoration, and these verses outline a process and responsibilities that if embraced, have the potential of releasing the believer from their bondage and restoring them to God.

What are Steps of Restoration?

1. Confession:

Restoration hinges on the honest and straightforward admission of failure. Sin can never be addressed if it is not named. It cannot be purged if it is not identified. It cannot be cleansed if it cannot be seen.

Occasionally we comprehend our sin alone, without the help of an outside voice. Guilt, shame, and loss of peace all creep into our souls and remind us of our error. Others may not be aware of their error, but we know. We fear discovery. We comprehend the enormity of our sin, as did David in Psalm 51.

More often than not, however, we rationalize our sin, deluding ourselves into believing that our behavior is acceptable or not that serious. We refuse to look at ourselves honestly, we ignore the stirrings in our conscience, and we avoid responsibility. We become defensive when questioned and find ourselves postponing the inevitable.

In either case, confession must take place, either at the prompting of the Spirit or by the approach of another believer, following the commands of (Matthew 18:15) and (Galatians 6:1).

Confession is the cleansing of the wound. It forces to the surface of the infection that has festered and stained us. It can be painful and humbling, but there is no other way for restoration to begin. Confession must be clear and straightforward. It cannot be couched in excuses or minimized by stubbornness. This confession must be made to God first, but it should also be made publicly to the church if the sin is publicly known. However, if the sin is unknown publicly then it should be properly dealt with privately. As a general rule, confession should be made to anyone directly injured by our sin. Confession of sin is a necessary step toward restoration and renewal. Confession to God opens the door for his forgiveness. Confession to the one offended opens the door for the victim’s forgiveness. Confession to the offended opens the door of opportunity for the church to demonstrate forgiveness.

2. Repentance:

To repent is to change course, to reverse direction. Once confession has been made and forgiveness received, repentance must be demonstrated. A firm commitment to turn away from the offending behavior must be made. According to Proverbs 28:13, God’s mercy is extended only to those who confess and forsake their sinful practices.

As with confession, the commitment to repent is most effective when rendered first of all to God and then secondly to the one injured by our offense. One’s confession of guilt to those sinned against accelerates the healing process for all involved in ways which secret promises cannot. In the same way a marriage vow is made before witnesses, a renewed commitment to walk with Christ is best made before witnesses.

Even when the sin is private, a specific plan outlining how the penitent person will make spiritual corrections will maximize success. An accountability system has great power to guard our steps. A spiritual mentor can help identify weaknesses, circumstances, and vulnerabilities and help steer a clear course. Enlisting a spiritual member of the church to work with us in being faithful is wise. Such “repentance plans” may be necessary for months or years, depending on the nature of the infraction and personal history, but every effort at restoration needs such a plan.

3. Restitution:

Some sins require restitution, the attempt to restore the loss someone else has suffered by our sin. Restitution typically involves a formal apology to the injured party and evidence of the offender’s intent to repent. The spiritual intent is to “gain the brother,” not to lose him. Restitution helps the wounded person understand that restoration is possible.

4. Discipline:

Establishing an accountability partner and disciplinary policies for restoration can be of great benefit. If the sin was public enough to require church discipline, it requires a commitment on the part of the church’s leadership to stand fast and consistently in implementing church discipline procedures.

Those representing the church must confront sin in the spirit of meekness and sincere humility, with each one acknowledging their own vulnerability to the enticements of sin. Discipline must be redemptive, not punitive. It must be forgiving and not judgmental.

5. Restoration:

When honest and straightforward confession has been made, repentance has been acknowledged and demonstrated, restitution has been pursued and completed, and a structure of loving discipline has been enforced, a formal end to the process should be recognized. The memory of the sin should be sealed and removed from all conversation, and a celebration of the Lord’s goodness and mercy should be enjoyed. After a proper time-frame, the wounded person may take his or her place back in service, free of the past and empowered spiritually to face the future.

No two circumstances are alike, but biblical guidelines are always valid helpful. Many wounded saints can be honorably returned to worthwhile service, if the appropriate steps are taken over a sufficient period of time.

When we come to our senses as did the prodigal in Luke 15, we can step back into the purposes for which God originally created us.

 * [ Adapted from Gantt Street Baptist Church ]

The Power of Forgiveness

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I always heard this quote but only recently discovered it’s origin: “To err is human; to forgive, divine.” It is almost given Scripture status although it does not come from the Bible… it comes from Alexander Pope, 1711. He is also the guy who said, “Fools rush in where angels fear to tread.” So, let’s look at forgiveness.

  1. What is the world’s opinion about forgiveness?
  2. How does that differ from scriptural teaching?
  3. What do you find most difficult, to seek forgiveness, to receive forgiveness or to offer forgiveness?
  4. Describe the last time you needed forgiveness.
  5. Describe a time when someone need forgiveness from you.

Video Questions:

  1. Would forgiveness be an automatic response, a delayed reaction or a withheld virtue for you in a similar situation?
  2. Do you feel that you have the power to choose to forgive?
  3. Hatred is a burden we don’t need to carry, and freedom is found only in forgiveness. How can you relate to the difficulty of forgiving others?
  4. Based on your own experiences, is the previous statement comforting or challenging?

Bible Study: Matthew 18:21-35

  1. How often are we to forgive someone? (Matthew 18:21-22)
  2. What is significant about the forgiveness the king offered compared to that which the slave withheld?
  3. Do you ever feel the weight of sin from which you have been forgiven?
  4. When we withhold forgiveness, what do you understand about the consequences? (Matthew 18:35)

Peter, wishing to appear especially forgiving and benevolent, asked Jesus if forgiveness was to be offered seven times. The Jewish rabbis at the time taught that forgiving someone more than three times was unnecessary, citing Amos 1:3-13 where God forgave Israel’s enemies three times, then punished them. By offering forgiveness more than double that of the Old Testament example, Peter perhaps expected extra commendation from the Lord. When Jesus responded that forgiveness should be offered 490 times, far beyond that which Peter was proposing, it must have stunned the disciples who were listening. Although they had been with Jesus for some time, they were still thinking in the limited terms of the law, rather than in the unlimited terms of grace.

By saying we are to forgive those who sin against us seventy times seven, Jesus was not limiting forgiveness to 490 times, a number that is, for all practical purposes, beyond counting. Christians with forgiving hearts not only don’t limit the number of times they forgive; they continue to forgive with as much grace the thousandth time as they do the first time. Christians are only capable of this type of forgiving spirit because the Spirit of God lives within us, and it is He who provides the ability to offer forgiveness over and over, just as God forgives us over and over.

Jesus answered that we must forgive as many times as necessary. His illustration is about a man who, although forgiven by his master of an overwhelming debt, refused to forgive another for a meager debt. When this man’s master heard about his ingratitude and injustice, he was outraged and had him thrown to the tormentors. “This is how My heavenly Father will treat each one of you, unless you forgive your brother from your heart” (Matthew 18:35).

Surely, by receiving such a massive pardon, we should not be so mean-spirited as to withhold forgiveness from others. Rather, we should emulate the example of Jesus. In truth, offering forgiveness is an act of will, and failure to acknowledge this will only encourage us to justify our own disobedience. Forgiveness is not a fruit that needs time to grow in our lives. It is not a result of some special encounter with God. Jesus makes that clear in Luke 17:4 when He commands that if someone sins against another seven times in one day and repents as many times, that person should be forgiven. Forgiving someone for the same offense several times in one year would be a major test of sanctification, so seven times in one day drives Jesus’ point home.

Bible Study: Luke 6:37-38

  1. What do these verses teach about forgiveness?
  2. How often have we granted forgiveness only because we feel we will one day seek forgiveness?
  3. If we refuse to forgive, we must take a look at our own heart, have we received the forgiveness from God?

Bible Study: Colossians 3:12-13

This letter is a warning against heresy and false teaching that had become a threat to the believers. They are to abandon certain things (listed in chapter 2) and then a list of how they were to conduct themselves. This verse on forgiveness is listed within the foundational teaching of the church.

Pray that God will help you live in Christ to the fullest, like this…

Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. 13 Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.

Why Forgive?

There is something strangely sweet about holding a grudge. The ability to withhold forgiveness and indulge in self-righteous feelings is a sense of power. God is the God of justice. Wrongs should be righted. And we deserve to feel contempt for those who hurt us. Except that it’s all a lie.

Refusing to forgive doesn’t grant us power, it enslaves us to sin. And feeling contempt for others very rarely makes a significant difference in their lives. Absolutely no good whatsoever comes from refusing to forgive. This is why Jesus said we are to forgive one another seventy times seven (Matthew 18:22). We should forgive so much that it becomes second nature—our automatic response to offenses.

God gives us two very good reasons in Scripture for why we should forgive.

  1. God commands us to forgive others. God forgave us while we were His enemies (Romans 5:10), and we should do likewise with one another.
  2. Those who forgive others indicate that they themselves have not been forgiven because a truly regenerated heart is a forgiving heart (Matthew 6:14-15). If we are filled with resentment and bitterness, we are exhibiting the “works of the flesh,” not the fruit of the Spirit which is evidence of true salvation (Galatians 5:19-23).

Most importantly, when we disobey one of God’s commands, such as the command to forgive, we sin against Him. In refusing to forgive another person, we sin against that person, but also against God. Considering that God puts our transgressions as far from Him as the east is from the west (Psalm 103:12), He expects us to extend this same grace to others. Our sin against God is infinitely more egregious than anything another person can do to us. Jesus’ parable of the unforgiving servant (Matthew 18:23-35) illustrates this truth. The servant had been forgiven a massive debt—symbolic of the debt of sin we owe to God—then refused to forgive a minor debt of a friend. The lesson of the parable is that if God’s forgiveness toward us is limitless, so should ours be limitless toward others (Luke 17:3-4).

Withholding Forgiveness:

The Bible teaches us that God withholds forgiveness towards people who are not repentant (2 Kings 24:4 and Lamentations 3:42). God is able to do this because of His very nature: He is sinless. He is perfect. He is holy. He simply will not tolerate sin. Paul warns those who choose to transgress God’s law in Romans 2:5, “But because of your stubbornness and your unrepentant heart, you are storing up wrath against yourself for the day of God’s wrath, when his righteous judgment will be revealed.”

As Christians we are certainly obligated to forgive others who sin against us when they are repentant if we are to expect God to forgive us when we sin against Him (Matthew 6:14-15, 18:23-35; Mark 11:25, Luke 17:3-4, Ephesians 4:31-32, Colossians 3:13). This holds true even if someone sins against us repeatedly (Matthew 18:21-22). However, this does not give us license to withhold forgiveness in the same way. The key to remember is this: God can judge a person’s intentions because He knows what’s in a person’s heart (1 Samuel 16:7; Hebrews 4:12-13), whereas we don’t. We are not God. We are not the Judge. For us to play God by refusing to offer forgiveness is an act of judgment on our part, and Jesus tells us that God will judge us according to the way we’ve judged others (Matthew 7:2).

What if There is No Indication of Repentance?

The law given to ancient Israel is similar to the New Testament teaching: “Do not hate your brother in your heart. Rebuke your neighbor frankly so you will not share in his guilt. Do not seek revenge or bear a grudge against one of your people, but love your neighbor as yourself. I am the Lord” (Leviticus 19:17-18). An unforgiving spirit leads to bitterness, anger, and seething resentment against another. Such a heart attitude cannot have true fellowship with God. Not holding grudges allows a state of mind that is ready and willing to forgive. Reconciliation is the goal, and if there cannot be reconciliation, an attitude of willingness to forgive must be maintained. There can be no excuse for withholding a forgiving spirit towards others (Matthew 5:22–24).

What About Forgive and Forget?

The phrase “forgive and forget” is not found in the Bible. However, there are numerous Scriptures commanding us to “forgive one another” (Matthew 6:14; Ephesians 4:32). A Christian who does not forgive can reap bitterness and the loss of eternal rewards (Hebrews 12:14-15; 2 John 1:8). Forgiveness is a decision of the will. Since God commands us to forgive, we must make a conscious choice to forgive. This frees the forgiving one from the past. The offender may not desire forgiveness and may not change (Matthew 5:44). Ideally, the offender will seek reconciliation, but if not, the one wronged should still make known his decision to forgive.

In one sense, it is impossible to truly forget sins that have been committed against us. We cannot selectively “delete” events from our memory. The Bible states that God does not “remember” our wickedness (Hebrews 8:12). Since God is all-knowing, he knows that we have “sinned and fall short of the glory of God” (Romans 3:23). However, having forgiven us, He treats us as if the sin had not occurred. If we belong to Him through faith in Christ, God does not hold our sins against us. In that sense we must “forgive and forget.” If we forgive someone, we must act as if that sin had never occurred. We remember the sin, but we live as if we did not remember it. Ephesians 4:32 tells us, “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”

Summary:

Human forgiveness and God’s forgiveness have differences. The Lord’s Prayer teaches that we are to ask for God’s forgiveness regularly, just as we are regularly to forgive others who have sinned against us. But human nature fights against this. As Paul said, “So I find this law at work: When I want to do good, evil is right there with me” (Romans 7:21). Like Paul, we must know that we are powerless in our own strength to do the right thing. But as Christians who possess the Holy Spirit, we can do all things through Christ who strengthens us (Philippians 4:13).

Discover Your Identity

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As soon as a new baby arrives in the world, we try to discover who that child most resembles. Later we see traits that resemble adults we know who are involved in the child’s life. What’s your story?

  1. Who do people say that you look like or act like?
  2. What is one character trait that you hope to pass on to the next generation?
  3. Describe your family of origin. What made your family unique?
  4. How do you think that adopted kids feel about hearing comments about how much someone’s child looks like one of the parents?

Video Discussion:

  1. In what ways did you attempt to define who you were as you were growing up?
  2. How does that differ from how you define yourself now?
  3. What are some defining markers in your life?
    1. Women tend to define themselves in terms of relationships (I’m Scott’s wife, or I’m Bethany’s mom).
    2. Men tend to need more autonomy to strengthen their identity and create individuality (I’m a pastor, I’m a golfer, I’m a Packers fan).
    3. Definition of Identity Crisis: According to Merriam-Webster online, it is “personal psychosocial conflict especially in adolescence that involves confusion about one’s social role and often a sense of loss of continuity to one’s personality.”
    4. Men can experience a loss of identity when they lose a job, or survive a divorce, or face a tragic loss.
  4. How do you describe your understand of “identity in Christ?”

Bible Study:

Paul wrote almost half the New Testament, covering tons of topics. He has likely influence the faith of Christianity more than any other human being. Let’s take a look at the event that cause Saul/Paul to have an identity crisis in his life:

  1. Acts 8:1-3
  2. Acts 9:1-31
  3. Philippians 3:3-6
  4. Acts 22:2-5, 28-29
  5. Galatians 2:18-20

Paul had every reason to take pride in his accomplishments, he was a guy who made it to the top of his profession, but none of those achievements mattered from God’s point of view. Take a look at how Paul sums up what happened to him (Philippians 3:7-10).

  1. Are you able to look at your own identity markers and say the same thing to God?
  2. Imagine for a moment that you are holding that which is most precious to you, it is possible for it to be a total loss compared to knowing Christ?
  3. How does this all play out in practical everyday life?

Take a look at Jeremiah 2:4-13. To whom is God speaking? Israel should have known better, but they chose to forsake God for wooden idols. An Idol is simple something that receives your faith other than God. It’s not always a false religion; it can be a job, a relationship, a position or status, a marriage, a possession. These are the things that begin to define our identity and relationships other than Jesus. Which identity marker do you struggle with the most? Which item has become to you as a broken cistern?

New Creation in Christ: 2 Corinthians 5:17

There are two Greek words which are translated “new” in the Bible. The first, neos, refers to something that has just been made, but there are already many others in existence just like it. The word translated “new” in this verse is the word kainos, which means “something just made which is unlike anything else in existence.” In Christ, we are made an entirely new creation, just as God created the heavens and the earth originally—He made them out of nothing, and so He does with us. He does not merely clean up our old selves; He makes an entirely new self. When we are in Christ, we are “partakers of the divine nature” (2 Peter 1:4). God Himself, in the person of His Holy Spirit, takes up residence in our hearts. We are in Christ and He is in us.

Regeneration in Christ:

In Christ, we are regenerated, renewed, and born again, and this new creation is spiritually minded, whereas the old nature is carnally minded. The new nature fellowships with God, obeys His will, and is devoted to His service. These are actions the old nature is incapable of doing or even desiring to do. The old nature is dead to the things of the spirit and cannot revive itself. It is “dead in trespasses and sins” (Ephesians 2:1) and can only be made alive by a supernatural awakening, which happens when we come to Christ and are indwelt by Him. Christ gives us a completely new and holy nature and an incorruptible life. Our old life, previously dead to God because of sin, is buried, and we are raised “to walk in newness of life” with Him (Romans 6:4).

New Status in Christ:

In our relationship with God, we are no longer His enemies, we are His children.

  1. Romans 3:10-11 describes the old self: “There is none righteous, not even one; there is none who understands, there is none who seeks for God.”
  2. Romans 5:10 describes the old self as enemies of God.
  3. Hosea 2:23 predicts the change of God’s heart toward us: “I will say to those called ‘Not my people,’ ‘You are my people’; and they will say, ‘You are my God.'”
  4. Galatians 3:26 announces the arrival of our new position in Christ: “For you are all sons of God through faith in Christ Jesus.”

Set Free in Christ:

If we belong to Christ…

  1. We are united to Him and no longer slaves to sin (Romans 6:5-6)
  2. We are made alive with Him (Ephesians 2:5)
  3. We are conformed to His image (Romans 8:29)
  4. We are free from condemnation and walking not according to the flesh, but according to the Spirit (Romans 8:1)
  5. We are part of the body of Christ with other believers (Romans 12:5).

The believer now possesses a new heart (Ezekiel 11:19) and has been blessed “with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus” (Ephesians 1:3).

My Identity in Christ:

  1. I am God’s child (John 1:12)
  2. I have been justified (Romans 5:1)
  3. I am a friend of Christ (John 15:15)
  4. I belong to God (1 Corinthians 6:20)
  5. I am a member of the Body of Christ (1 Corinthians 12:27)
  6. I have assurance of God’s best (Romans 8:28)
  7. I have redemption (Ephesians 1:7-8)
  8. I have purpose (Ephesians 2:10)
  9. I have access to the Father (Ephesians 2:18)
  10. I have the mind of Christ (1 Corinthians 2:16)
  11. I have victory (1 John 5:4)
  12. I am blameless (1 Corinthians 1:8)
  13. I have been set free (Romans 8:2)

Think About It:

  1. Which of these claims is most comforting to you?
  2. Which of these claims is most difficult for you?
  3. What part of your life will you surrender to Christ? (this does not mean you can walk away from your roles or relationships… but consider it loss in relation to the fact of loving and knowing Christ.

God’s Part in Spiritual Formation

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Some say it is all God and others it is all our own effort, but spiritual formation is a partnership. Take a look at some of the things God’s does in our spiritual formation:

1. God Makes us Partakers of the New Covenant & New Creature in Christ:

The church is made up of believers who are partakers of the New Covenant.

  • Ezekiel 36:26-27, Moreover, I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit within you; and I will remove the heart of stone from your flesh and give you a heart of flesh. 27 I will put My Spirit within you and cause you to walk in My statutes, and you will be careful to observe My ordinances.
  • 2 Corinthians 5:17, Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.

Thirty three things happen in the life of a church saint at the moment of their salvation. Lewis Sperry Chafer

Some people struggle to become more like Christ because they want to become one of His followers before becoming one of His children. Often they want to follow some biblical principle in order to experience temporal relief from some temporal problem. To ask an unbeliever to live the Christian life before becoming a Christian is like asking them to fly when they don’t have wings.

2. God Gives You a New Nature so You Can Change:

  • 2 Peter 1:4, For by these He has granted to us His precious and magnificent promises, so that by them you may become partakers of the divine nature, having escaped the corruption that is in the world by lust.
  • 2 Peter 2:17-22, These are springs without water and mists driven by a storm, for whom the black darkness has been reserved. 18 For speaking out arrogant words of vanity they entice by fleshly desires, by sensuality, those who barely escape from the ones who live in error, 19 promising them freedom while they themselves are slaves of corruption; for by what a man is overcome, by this he is enslaved. 20 For if, after they have escaped the defilements of the world by the knowledge of the Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, they are again entangled in them and are overcome, the last state has become worse for them than the first. 21 For it would be better for them not to have known the way of righteousness, than having known it, to turn away from the holy commandment handed on to them. 22 It has happened to them according to the true proverb, “A DOG RETURNS TO ITS OWN VOMIT,” and, “A sow, after washing, returns to wallowing in the mire.”

3. God the Father Helps Us Grow:

  • John 15:1-2, I am the true grapevine, and my Father is the gardener. 2 He cuts off every branch of mine that doesn’t produce fruit, and he prunes the branches that do bear fruit so they will produce even more.
  • Philippians 2:13, for it is God who is at work in you, both to will and to work for His good pleasure.

4. God Gives us the Spirit, the “Helper” to Make us Holy:

  • 2 Thessalonians 2:13 But we should always give thanks to God for you, brethren beloved by the Lord, because God has chosen you from the beginning for salvation through sanctification by the Spirit and faith in the truth.
  • John 16:8-11, And when he comes, he will convict the world concerning sin and righteousness and judgment: 9 concerning sin, because they do not believe in me; 10 concerning righteousness, because I go to the Father, and you will see me no longer; 11 concerning judgment, because the ruler of this world is judged.
  • John 14:26, But the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in My name, He will teach you all things, and bring to your remembrance all that I said to you.
  • John 16:13, But when He, the Spirit of truth, comes, He will guide you into all the truth; for He will not speak on His own initiative, but whatever He hears, He will speak; and He will disclose to you what is to come.
  • James 4:5-6, Or do you think that the Scripture speaks to no purpose: “He jealously desires the Spirit which He has made to dwell in us”? 6 But He gives a greater grace. Therefore it says, “God is opposed to the proud, but gives grace to the humble.”
  • 1 Thessalonians 4:7-8, For God has not called us for impurity, but in holiness. 8 Therefore whoever disregards this, disregards not man but God, who gives his Holy Spirit to you.

5. God Uses Trials to Shape Our Character:

Problems in our lives are God’s way of rearing His children and developing their character.

  • James 1:2-8, Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. 5But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him. But he must ask in faith without any doubting, for the one who doubts is like the surf of the sea, driven and tossed by the wind. 7For that man ought not to expect that he will receive anything from the Lord, 8 being a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways. (See also Romans 5:3-5)

Trials are God-directed and God allowed and self-imposed.

  • 1 Corinthians 10:13, No temptation has overtaken you but such as is common to man; and God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will provide the way of escape also, so that you will be able to endure it.

6. God Spanks Us (Chastisement) for our Growth

  • Hebrews 12:5-11, And have you forgotten the exhortation that addresses you as sons? “My son, do not regard lightly the discipline of the Lord, nor be weary when reproved by him.  6 For the Lord disciplines the one he loves, and chastises every son whom he receives.” 7 It is for discipline that you have to endure. God is treating you as sons. For what son is there whom his father does not discipline? 8 If you are left without discipline, in which all have participated, then you are illegitimate children and not sons. 9 Besides this, we have had earthly fathers who disciplined us and we respected them. Shall we not much more be subject to the Father of spirits and live? 10 For they disciplined us for a short time as it seemed best to them, but he disciplines us for our good, that we may share his holiness. 11 For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.
  • 1 Corinthians 11:27-32, Whoever, therefore, eats the bread or drinks the cup of the Lord in an unworthy manner will be guilty concerning the body and blood of the Lord. 28 Let a person examine himself, then, and so eat of the bread and drink of the cup. 29 For anyone who eats and drinks without discerning the body eats and drinks judgment on himself. 30 That is why many of you are weak and ill, and some have died. 31 But if we judged ourselves truly, we would not be judged. But when we are judged by the Lord, we are disciplined so that we may not be condemned along with the world.

[Based on my classes with Richard D. Leineweber, Jr. c. 2000]

The Truth About Secrets

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Everyone has a story to tell, and every part of our lives make up that story… victories, successes and the mistakes. Author Jeannie St. John Taylor wrote a book called “You Wouldn’t Love Me if You Knew” where a boy did something wrong and is afraid he can never be forgiven. He tries to replace the mistake with a series of good deeds but he never feels good enough. Once he comes clean, he learns a powerful truth about forgiveness.

  1. When was the last time you felt unforgivable? What did you learn?
  2. How often to you feel like that little boy… if we only knew your deepest and darkest most private secrets of your life?
  3. If you are currently keeping a secret, why do you think you are afraid to be honest?
  4. When was a time where you came clean with a secret, how did the most important people in your life respond?
  5. How do relationship suffer or benefit from being vulnerable?

Video Questions:

  1. How did you feel after seeing this scene in the film?
  2. How do you think Hannah felt when Cindy denied her the truth she was seeking? How can you relate?
  3. Has someone close to you ever kept a secret (the truth) from you? How did you feel? How did you respond when you learned the truth?
  4. How can you relate to Cindy’s response in this scene?

Bible Study: (2 Samuel 12:1-17) David is a man that has all of his ups and downs record for the world to see, throughout generations of time. The man after God’s own heart, the adulterous murderer king.

David was a giant among godly leaders, but he remained human as his sin with Bathsheba and Uriah showed. He spied Bathsheba bathing, desired her, and engineered the death of her faithful warrior husband, after committing adultery with her (2 Sam. 11).

Nathan, the prophet, confronted David with his secret sin, and David confessed his wrongdoing. The newborn child of David and Bathsheba died. David acknowledged his helplessness in the situation, confessing faith that he would go to be with the child one day. Bathsheba conceived again, bearing Solomon (2 Samuel 12:1-25).

  1. How is it easier to see the sin in someone else but not see it in ourselves? (2 Samuel 12:5-6)
  2. What did Nathan say would be the result of David’s sin? (2 Samuel 12:10-14)
  3. How did David respond when his sin was uncovered? (2 Samuel 12:16-17)
  4. How are you impacted by knowing that David was forgiven but still had to endure the consequences of his sin?

For the rest of the story: Able to rule the people but not his family, David saw intrigue, sexual sins, and murder rock his own household, resulting in his isolation from and eventual retreat before his son Absalom.

  • David grieved long and deep when his army killed Absalom (2 Samuel 18:19-33).
  • David’s kingdom was restored, but the hints of division between Judah and Israel remained (2 Samuel 19:40-43).
  • David had to put down a northern revolt (2 Samuel 20).
  • The last act the books of Samuel report about David is his census of the people, bringing God’s anger but also preparing a place for the temple to be built (2 Samuel 24).
  • The last chapters of 1 Chronicles describe extensive preparations David made for the building and the worship services of the temple.
  • David’s final days involved renewed intrigue among his family, as Adonijah sought to inherit his father’s throne, but Nathan and Bathsheba worked to ensure that Solomon became the next king (1 Kings 1:1-2:12).

Take a look at Psalm 32:

  1. David writes these psalms as confession of his sin. Psalm 32:3 mentions that he kept silent about his sin, how did that make him feel physically and emotionally? (Psalm 32:3-4)
  2. What are some ways that you see sin and guilt affecting people?
  3. According to Psalm 32:5, what did David do and what did God do?
  4. What lessons did David learn about sin and secrets (Bathsheba, Uriah, the front lines)? (Psalm 32:6-11)

A baby lost his life, a warrior lost his life, a woman lost her husband… but don’t judge David too harshly. How have you been like David the sinner?

Take a look at Psalm 51: this is a deeper confession of David’s sin

How have you been like David the forgiven?

The fact is that we have all done horrible things and we try to put on the false face to hide the truth from other people. Here are a few truths about secrets:

  1. Secrets birth other secrets.
  2. Secrets make us lonely.
  3. Secrets disconnect us from other people.
  4. Secrets are not secrets from God, while they do strain our relationship with him.
  5. Secrets prevent us from being fully alive in Christ.
  6. Secrets lose their power when they are shared.

Assignment and Challenge:

  1. What is there about your personality that not many people know?
  2. What is something you have overcome that not many people know?
  3. What is something with which you struggle that not many people know?

What Does the Bible Say About Keeping Secrets?

A secret can be difficult to keep and equally difficult to share, yet life seems to run on secrets, from concealing birthday presents, to obscuring a difficult past, to protecting the whereabouts of an important political figure. The Bible teaches, indirectly, that secrets can be either good or bad, but it does not clearly delineate the right and wrong uses of secrets.

Throughout the history of Israel, political and military secrets are mentioned without pronouncing any moral judgments for or against them (e.g., 2 Samuel 15:35-36). However, in the story of Samson and Delilah (Judges 16:4-22), Samson reveals the source of his strength, an act which, based on the aftermath of his admission, was awfully stupid. It was a secret he should have kept.

Esther’s story provides a positive example of someone who kept a secret. Her decision to hide her nationality (Esther 2:20) became an integral part of God’s plan to save His people (Esther 4:13; 7:3-6). The same story also supports the morality of revealing a secret that, if kept hidden, would cause great wrong or serious harm (Esther 2:21-23).

Proverbs, the central book among the “wisdom literature” of the Bible, is the most explicit about secrets. Chapter 11 says that “a man of understanding holds his tongue. A gossip betrays a confidence, but a trustworthy man keeps a secret” (Proverbs 11:12-13). So, keeping a secret can be noble, but secrets kept for the wrong reason earn a person the title of “wicked,” for “a wicked man accepts a bribe in secret to pervert the course of justice” (Proverbs 17:23), and “whoever slanders his neighbor in secret, him will I put to silence” (Psalm 101:5).

One type of secret is always wrong: trying to hide sin. “He who conceals his sins does not prosper, but whoever confesses and renounces them finds mercy” (Proverbs 28:13). When it comes to our sin, God wants full disclosure, and He grants full forgiveness (Isaiah 1:18).

Of course, there’s no use trying to hide our sin from God. Nothing can be kept from Him. He is “the God of gods . . . and a revealer of secrets” (Daniel 2:47). Even our “secret sins” are exposed in His light (Psalm 90:8). “For nothing is secret that will not be revealed, nor anything hidden that will not be known and come to light” (Luke 8:17).

God Himself keeps some things—likely many things—hidden from us: “The secret things belong to the LORD our God” (Deuteronomy 29:29). Jesus asked several people to keep miracles He had done secret. For example, Jesus healed two blind men and told them to “see that no one knows about this” (Matthew 9:30). When Job realized the immensity of God’s knowledge, he spoke of “things too wonderful for me to know” (Job 42:3).

We can conclude that God does not consider keeping a secret to be sinful in and of itself. There are some things that people should know and some things they should not. God’s concern is how secrets are used, whether to protect or to hurt.

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Are You Inspiring Others?

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This is a great reminder to follow my example, as I follow Christ (Ephesians 5:2, 1 Corinthians 4:17, Philippians 2:12, 3:17, Colossians 2:6, John 13:15, 2 Thessalonians 3:7, 3:9, 1 Peter 2:21). We each can make a difference in the lives of others. What is holding you back from setting the pace?

What is Bad Religion?

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Have you ever been disappointed or even angry with religion? Perhaps you’ve heard someone say that the church is full of hypocrites. Maybe you’ve even said that yourself!

This is a passage of Scripture that we looked at last night, the first is out series on Decision: Seeking God’s Guidance. At the end, you’ll see how this chapter fits into the topic.

Isaiah rebuked Israel for practicing bad religion—religion that benefited no one and offended God (Isaiah 58:1–14). The prophet specifically zeroed in on fasting (Isaiah 58:2–5), pointing out ways in which the people misused this important spiritual discipline:

  • They nagged God in the interests of their own personal gain.
  • While seeking their own self-interests, they exploited their laborers.
  • Their fasts became a source of strife, debate, and hostility toward others.
  • They used severe fasting practices to call attention to themselves.

After challenging these practices, Isaiah described what true fasting ought to be like (Isaiah 58:6–13):

  • It should result in bringing relief to the oppressed.
  • It should result in feeding the hungry.
  • It should result in the poor being taken into homes for shelter and clothing.
  • Superior attitudes of finger pointing and evil should decline and ultimately disappear.
  • It should lead to repairing things, including damaged relationships.
  • It should involve treating the Sabbath as a day to worship the Lord rather than continuing to work for personal gain.

It’s easy to point the finger at others and criticize or ridicule their religious practices and spiritual life, but what about your own patterns of faith? How do they measure up to the Lord’s description of true religion? If there are places where you need to change, find at least one other person who will hold you accountable for making the necessary reforms.

For me, Isaiah 58:11 ties this chapter to the key on seeking God’s guidance: The Lord will guide you continually, giving you water when you are dry and restoring your strength. Pay attention to THIS chapter to better position yourself to hear from God and allow him to guide you.

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