Category: Men of Steel

The Enemy Within Me

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The Men of Steel looked into this topic; how often do we wrestle with God?

  1. The Enemy within Me
  2. God Sparing Your Life
  3. Refuse to be a Target
  4. God Wrestles with You… Alone
  5. Why Does God Wrestle with Men?
  6. The Reality of the Spirit Realm

Today I will begin a series about men who are in a wrestling match with God. Wrestling is a popular spectator sport for many men and young people. I’ve seen the commercials and the crowds; there are a lot of pro wrestling fanatics out there! Men today are in a wrestling match for their lives and many don’t even know it.

In any group of men there is every sort of need, weakness and struggle. Rather than waiting for a more opportune moment, today is the day we need to get our act together! We must confront ourselves with the enemy within each one of us. What is the enemy within me? Take a look at Romans 1:28-29, 30-32.

There are other lists that deal with sorcery, witchcraft, demonology, astrology but that is not where I find many men today. Crime affects us, and I’m concerned about crime, but I’m not as concerned about the mugger, the rapist and the conman on the street. I’m concerned with the enemy within me; it is the same enemy that is within each of us. We must each intentionally and willfully confront this enemy before we are ruined by it.

When a man ignores the commandments of God and refuses to acknowledge Him or His call to godly living, the worst punishment God can do on earth is to give that man over to himself (Romans 1:28). Men can become slaves to their own reprobate mind. Burger King used to have an ad campaign with the slogan, “Have it your way,” but the problem with men is that when we have it our own way, we self-destruct!

I am amazed that one man can look at another man and arrogantly say that “I’m better than that other guy.” The fact is that we are all just one step away from self-destruction; you can fill in the blank and name your weakness or your enemy. We then try to justify that our sin is not as bad as that other guy’s sin… but we miss the fact that we have all sinned (Romans 3:23).

We have the capacity to commit every kind of sin. We may not have done it, but odds are that we have thought about it. Even if we have not done it yet, given the right situation and the right circumstance, we will think about it and possibly even do it.

In my library I have a book called Situation Ethics. The premise is that a person will sacrifice a certain value to uphold what we believe to be a higher value. A gunman comes in to your office seeking to kill Joe Blow, and you lie to the gunman telling him Joe Blow is out sick today (knowing that he is really down in the break room). You value life higher than truthfulness in this situation. Knowing suicide is wrong, a 13 year old Amish girl named Marian Fisher told the gunman to shoot her first, hoping to save the lives of the younger children in that Lancaster County schoolhouse. Would not a passivist do whatever he could to stop an intruder from going after his wife or teenaged daughter? Would not a starving man who came across a cart filled with food turn into a thief to feed his family?

Human nature is depraved. We all have a terrible capacity toward sin. Each of us must face the enemy within us is order to become victorious over it. The Bible says we are not to be slaves of sin, and if we commit sin, we are slaves to it (Romans 7:14, 7:25, 2 Peter 2:19, 1 John 1:8).

That is why Men of Steel is so important. There is strength in numbers, there is safety in numbers, and there is victory in accountability to one another. It’s not bearing your soul before a group, that’s not what we do on Saturday, but it is finding another man who’s got your back. We just spent a few weeks looking at the Lame Man at the Gate; to know your weakness (that which makes you lame), to know why you come to church (not just hanging out at a “beautiful gate”), to not be distracted (but focusing on Christ and His Word).

Who do you know who might benefit from joining us on Saturdays?

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Was the Lame Man at the Gate Distracted?

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The Men of Steel looked into this topic; this lame man represents all men and the issues we face:

  1. Who was the Lame Man at the Gate? (Acts 3:1, 2, 3)
  2. What are You Expecting From the Church?
  3. How Did You Get Where You Are?
  4. Are You Trapped at the Gate?
  5. Was the Lame Man at the Gate Distracted?

This is part five from the Men of Steel topic on the Lame Man at the Gate (From Acts 3:1-5).

The Bible says that when Peter and John came to the temple at the hour of prayer, they fixed their eyes on the lame man (Acts 3:4). Peter said to him, “Look on us.” I believe that Peter didn’t want this man to be distracted. If a man gets distracted, he can miss what God has for him.

Peter wanted this man to pay close attention to what he was about to do. He wanted him to intently hear him. Maybe he got right down in his face, locking eyes so that everything else in that lame man’s world just faded away. That’s the way we need to deal with men who are in pain. When we’re the ones suffering, that’s the way we need to look at Jesus. We need to get so close to Him that we don’t see anybody else.

Then Peter spoke to him using a name (Acts 3:6). Every one of us needs a name that is stronger than ourselves, our problems; a name that is greater than our need, a name that is more powerful than our pain. He spoke the name of Jesus. Paul would later write, “At the name of Jesus every knee should bow … and that every tongue should confess that Jesus Christ is Lord” (Philippians 2:10-11).

It is the name of Jesus that is higher than any other name. The writer of Hebrews says, He is “holy, harmless, undefiled … and made higher than the heavens” (Hebrews 7:26). There is no other name that can heal men of their lameness. Then Peter went beyond words. Notice the words of Peter had no visible effect on this man’s life. Men may hear sermons each week and find that nothing changes in their lives. Men all around us in need of hearing about the love and forgiveness of God, yet have not experience any of it for themselves.

Peter put the name of Jesus into action by reaching down and taking this lame man by the right hand and lifting him up. This lame man’s feet and ankle bones were healed as Peter lifted him up (Acts 3:7). Notice that this guy who had never walked, didn’t need any help walking (Acts 3:8). He only needed help getting up on his feet. Now he was standing, walking, and leaping as he praised God.

There are men all around us today who need for us to speak the right name to them—and they need for us to help them get to their feet spiritually and emotionally. We don’t need to be their crutch, but we do need to pull them to their feet so that God can heal and strengthen the lameness in their lives.

How can we as Men of Steel speak Christ to other men, and put into action words that can bring more men into the group? How can we make other men thirsty for healing and fulfillment? What are some practical things that we can do to minister to men in our church, community and workplace? What sort of things do you personally need from the Men of Steel? How can the group help you to become all that God wants you to be? What are the distractions that are keeping you from being totally sold out to Jesus? What are a few steps of faith that you believe God is calling you to take?

Are You Trapped at the Gate?

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The Men of Steel looked into this topic; this lame man represents all men and the issues we face:

  1. Who was the Lame Man at the Gate? (Acts 3:1, 2, 3)
  2. What are You Expecting From the Church?
  3. How Did You Get Where You Are?
  4. Are You Trapped at the Gate?
  5. Was the Lame Man at the Gate Distracted?

I thought I was finished with the Lame Man at the Gate, but not so fast, here’s part four… I find his story very appropriate for men today, and I have another observation to bring up. (Acts 3:2)

Remember that friends carried this lame guy to the gate, and at the end of the day they took him back to his home. Take a look at just where they left him; at a gate of the temple that was so beautiful that they called it the “Beautiful Gate.” See the irony? This man had an ugly problem and it matters little that he was at the Beautiful Gate! Any man with an ugly problem (visible or secret) cannot enjoy or appreciate the beauty around him.

Don’t forget, all this is taking place in the Promised Land, the “land flowing with milk and honey.” This was a descriptive for God’s care, provision and blessing; providing His people with the land that He promised Abraham generations ago. As a lame man, he was not able to enter the temple (2 Samuel 5:8), which was reserved for able-bodied men. Even though he was in the right place, he’s not really a part of the religious community.

Today, so many men are close to being in the right place, they are not fully there. They’re close enough to the church to know what’s going on, to know who’s who and what is being preached, but they are not all the way into the body of Christ. These guys are trapped at the gate.

The contemporary Christian music group, Building 429, has a song out called, “You Carried Me” (fits the lame theme, right?). Here are a few lines from the song…

I’ve been so busy. I missed the reasons.
I missed Your love and I nearly missed it all.
Still You’ve held me and You’ve healed me.
You’ve given all and it brought me to Your cross.
And I stand only because
You’ve given me grace to walk, only because…

You carried me. You carried me.
You carried me through it all.
And I believe. Yes I believe.
You’ll carry me all the way home, ‘cause mercy covers all.

I know the Scripture. I’ve known the songs.
I sang the words from my hollowed heart.
But You’ve spoken softly through the storm.
I’ve heard Your voice and I’ve felt the calm.

We can be so familiar with the church and the ritual that we fail to encounter the God whom the church worships and serves. He is the only reason we gather in the first place. Men can sit at a distance, at a beautiful gate, and then feel as if they are exactly where they need to be. But they are still trapped by their ugly problem, this whole life-affecting problem. They don’t get it; that God can heal their heart, their marriage, their family, their relationships, and touch their soul and bring peace, purpose and potential.

All this to say that men today can be so close to the church yet still embrace the problem that causes their lameness. Rather than going through the motions, we need to get connected to the source of life, meaning and our only real help. God can carry us through our brokenness, and when that happens, the essence of the beautiful gate will rub off on us and we can live up to it’s name.

How Did You Get Where You Are?

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The Men of Steel looked into this topic; this lame man represents all men and the issues we face:

  1. Who was the Lame Man at the Gate? (Acts 3:1, 2, 3)
  2. What are You Expecting From the Church?
  3. How Did You Get Where You Are?
  4. Are You Trapped at the Gate?
  5. Was the Lame Man at the Gate Distracted?

This is part three from the Men of Steel topic on the Lame Man at the Gate and What Are You Expecting? (From Acts 3:1-5).

Ever think about that question? Sometimes we ask this question when we get deep into trouble, but not so much when things go well. Do well, and it’s internal… it’s my giftedness, ability or determination, but if we’re in trouble it goes to something more external like dumb luck, circumstances, “the devil made me do it” or life is just out of control. As the Nationwide commercial goes, life comes at your fast.

A friend told me about a story about a turtle on the top of a fence post. If you find someone at the top of his game like that, you have to assume that someone else put him there. No one gets to the top alone. Another positive illustration of community.

Just how do we get through the rough things of life? We often look at our lame legs and fail to see the bigger picture. Remember that our lameness is anything that is considered to be a problem, a personal need or an area of weakness in our lives. Sometimes we don’t consider where we are because we don’t have a clear picture of where we’ve been or how we got there.

The lame man did not get that way due to an injury because he was born a cripple. This is all he had ever known. His lameness was not a disease or an injury, but a weakness. But think about it, this guy had two advantages that men today do not have:

  1. He knew he had a problem: It was obvious to him and to those around him. He was forced to face his problem, and faced it daily. Men today do not see any major flaws in their lives. Perhaps making it through the day, not getting fired, not messing up in a social situation is a sign that they are doing life just fine. Each of us has our kryptonite and we must face it even if it is not obvious to others.
  2. This guy also knew there was a reason for his lameness: He knew the cause of his problem; he was lame from birth. He knew the answer to the question, “Why am I like this?” If we want to get our lives back on track, we have to ask the same question, “Why am I like this?” or “Why do I do what I do?” Until we know why we are filled with hate, envy, foul language, lust, anger, bitterness… we can’t fully understand how to get beyond our lameness.

Have you ever asked yourself questions like these?

  1. Why do I come home from church (where I’ve acted like a saint) and act like a monster with my wife and children?
  2. Why don’t I know how to communicate?
  3. Why am I unwilling to communicate better?
  4. Why do I feel inner rage all the time?
  5. Why is my life out of control?
  6. Why don’t I succeed at work?
  7. Why do I feel depressed?
  8. Why am I not further along in my walk with God?

I recently read about a challenge to look over my resume, to look back over my life, and try to discover why I’ve camped out with my lameness for so long. When we look closely, we discover that we need a Savior, a Lord, and relationships with other believing men who will teach us the Bible, model a godly lifestyle, and help us to become more like Jesus Christ. It’s a great journey of discovery, and I’m glad that the Men of Steel group is a part of that healing process.

There is a reason that we are like we are, and there’s a greater reason or purpose for our lives. You are who you are, but you are not yet who you will become. Pastor Jerry reminded us that “the best is yet to be.” God has bigger and better things for you, for your marriage and for your family. So consider your problem of lameness, but also consider the cause, not forgetting the result that we find by being in Christ.

Like the turtle on top of the fence post, how can we help each other to make it to the top of our potential? How can we help you be all you can be for Christ?

What Are You Expecting From the Church?

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The Men of Steel looked into this topic; this lame man represents all men and the issues we face:

  1. Who was the Lame Man at the Gate? (Acts 3:1, 2, 3)
  2. What are You Expecting From the Church?
  3. How Did You Get Where You Are?
  4. Are You Trapped at the Gate?
  5. Was the Lame Man at the Gate Distracted?

This is part two from the Men of Steel topic on the Lame Man at the Gate (From Acts 3:1-5).

Just why is it that you go to church? Why are you really there? Is this a question that you have ever asked yourself…besides perhaps during a particularly boring guest speaker?

  1. Are you at church so you have the right to tell others they need to be in church?
  2. Are you at church so you can play a role that you feel gives you status in your community?
  3. Are you at church because your family expects you to be there?
  4. Are you at church to keep your wife from nagging and pleading for you to be there?
  5. Are you at church because it is a habit?
  6. Are you at church because you enjoy the company of friends?
  7. Are you at church out of some sense of guilt, or for fire insurance?

This question of expectation is not too far from what Jesus said in Matthew 11:7-15 (Just who did you go out to the wilderness to see?). So, let’s add another question to the list above, Who are you going to church to see and to hear?

It’s not for the choir, not for the preacher, not for the fellowship, not for the business contacts… just as the lame man at the gate, we often go to church looking for the wrong thing (Acts 3:4-5). He sought a handout, not healing.

We also need to take a look at the way in which we see other people around us each day. What do we expect from these encounters? Do we approach people the same way as this lame man did? Are we looking for something that we can get from them, or for what they can do for us? We should be looking for what God wants to do through us or even what God will do in us.

Sometimes we are looking for people to help us get out of some problem in our lives. This guy was looking for what he could take from others; something which would comes to him without effort or responsibility. These types of people are users. They use people and love things, rather than the other way around.

God calls us to see Him when we look at other people. Jesus said that when we do something for the least of these my brothers, you have done it to Me (Matthew 25:45).

So, when you go to church, do you come expecting to encounter God?

  1. Do you expect Him to show you something new out of His Word?
  2. Do you expect Him to work among His people here at King’s Grant?
  3. Do you expect that God will show you the best thing for your life, and heal you from the lameness that keeps us bound and begging?
  4. Do you expect that God is the One to set you free from the bondage that keeps you lame in the first place?
  5. Do you freely pass on that which God has so freely given you (Matthew 10:8)?

Take a few moments right now to identify what you expect from God. Gather with the church this Sunday because it is the right thing to do, and because God deserves your worship. Identify the barriers that are keeping you from being the man of God that He wants you to become.

As Men of Steel, we must constantly be on the lookout for the kryptonite that so easily trips us up (2 Timothy 2:4, Hebrews 12:1, 2 Peter 2:20).

The Lame Man at the Gate

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The Men of Steel looked into this topic; this lame man represents all men and the issues we face:

  1. Who was the Lame Man at the Gate? (Acts 3:1, 2, 3)
  2. What are You Expecting From the Church?
  3. How Did You Get Where You Are?
  4. Are You Trapped at the Gate?
  5. Was the Lame Man at the Gate Distracted?

Today I write about a story in the Bible where Peter and John go to church together for prayer time, at around 3:00 in the afternoon. In this story is a lame man who was carried into the Temple and is sitting at the Beautiful Gate (Acts 3:1-2).

Think about the lame guy for a moment. There was nothing wrong with this man in many parts of his body, because he could see, hear, touch and speak. He could move his upper body just fine. There was really only one thing wrong, he could not walk due to his crippled lower legs or feet. But that one weakness was severe enough to affect his entire life. We might say that this one problem was a whole-life problem.

He was handicapped and needed to be carried. He could not support himself, stand on his own or live life on his own. His situation had nothing to do with his character, whether he was a good man in his heart or in his motives. It had to do with having a bad problem.

His problem made him dependent on other people. His problem interfered with the lives of others, being carried to a place to beg and at the end of the day he is carried back home. He could not get to where he wanted to be on his own.

Perhaps this guy felt discouraged or he had a low self-esteem. A man in this situation will feel demeaned and diminished. He is not allowed to participate in activities with other men. Perhaps he does not feel like a real man.

Maybe his physical lameness moved to his emotions and his spirit. This would mean that at the beginning his legs were lame, now he was lame.

I feel that nearly all men are in this position today. We each have a weakness that keeps us from functioning as a whole person. Most of us just deny our lameness. We also pass by others because we do not have the courage or the compassion to stop and help.

This is why I have such a heart for a ministry to men. I may not have all the answers, but my heart bleeds for men who are trapped by their own lameness, many of whom don’t realize or recognize their need.

I hope that the Men of Steel will help all of us to stop fooling ourselves. We need God’s healing power. We need His strength to be the men He has called us to be. We are lame at the gate and we need help.

The good news is that God sends people our way, right to our place at the gate. They help us understand what God has for us. Look out for that person in your life, and let him in to your circle. Remember to be aware that you may be that person to another lame man.

What if Jesus Took Your Place for a Year?

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Talk about making a difference… Os Hillman wrote an interesting list of changes that might happen if Jesus took your place in the office this year. We might imagine: 

 

  • He would do His work with excellence. He would be known around the office for the great work He did (Exodus 31:2-3).
  • He would develop new ideas for doing things better (Ephesians 3:20).
  • He would hang out with sinners in order to develop a relationship with them in order to speak to them about the Father (Matthew 9:12).
  • He would strategically pray for each worker about their concerns and their needs. He would pray for those who even disliked Him (Matthew 5:44).
  • He would rally the office to support a needy family perhaps during Thanksgiving or Christmas (Jeremiah 22:16).
  • He would offer to pray for those who were sick in the office and see them get healed (Matthew 14:14).
  • He would honor the boss and respect him/her (Titus 2:9).
  • He would consider the boss as His authority in His workplace (Romans 13:1).
  • He would be truthful in all his dealings and never exaggerate for the sake of advancement (Psalm 15:2).
  • He would be concerned about His city (Luke 19:41).
  • He would always have a motive to help others become successful, even at his own expense (Proverbs 16:2).

 

Sounds like some good ideas we could each model, at work and .

 

Men, how can you really make a difference in the office knowing these details listed above? Can we commit to praying diligently for personal boldness…

 

  • To live our lives in a manner worthy of a follower of Jesus?
  • To emphasize the nature of community in our personal faith?
  • To implement our marching orders called the Great Commission (Matthew 28:19-20)?
  • To put into practice the Great Commandment (Matthew 22:36-40)?
  • To endure the hardships of living out our faith in a practical fashion?

 

You know, we are not promised that the Christian life would be easy! I’m fascinated by the story of the early church in Acts 4. Peter and John have been jailed, flogged, warned not to speak about Jesus or the resurrection, and then released. Following all the threats and persecution of believers, the early church prays. What I find fascinating is that in their prayer, during this threat of persecution, was not a word about God ending the persecution, but that they might boldly speak the Word of God in confidence (Acts 4:29).

 

How can we match there tenacity, confidence and boldness in living out what we say we believe? While the Christian life may not be easy, we are promised that we do not go through this life alone!

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Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader?

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Have seen the show? Sort of humbling as they ask questions, isn’t it? Think about all of the knowledge that you have acquired over the years, and how much of it has long since been forgotten? But when you think about it, we rarely forget the wis­dom we have gained over the years. In this passage of Scripture, we read about the wisest guy who ever lived. When asked by God, “What should I give you?” (2 Chronicles 1:7), Solomon was smart enough to ask God for both wisdom and knowledge (2 Chronicles 1:10).

 

It Takes Wisdom and Knowledge

Solomon could have asked for anything he wanted, he had a blank check from God… money, power, women, world peace, a fast bass boat… but he showed that he was wise beyond his years when he recognized that he needed both wisdom and knowledge to effectively lead his people. Knowledge was not enough for him and it’s not enough for us either. A wise person uses knowledge to live properly and to live well.

 

These two prerequisites for effective leadership haven’t changed since the time of Solomon. They are timeless and they apply to leadership at any level. Regardless of your job description and title, you are a leader in some way. Leadership is simply the art and science of influencing others. Good sources of knowledge aren’t too hard to come by—you can find out about almost any subject on the Internet and what you don’t find there you can probably read in a book. Finding good sources of wisdom, however, tends to be a little more difficult.

 

Wisdom is more caught than taught. Who are the wise people that you consider your role models? What men do you know that appear to have it together in their marriage, or in raising their children, or in their career? What can you learn from them? Are you teachable? Are you willing to learn from others? How often do you claim to have it all together when just below the surface you are wounded, scared, disappointed and desperate?

 

Wisdom is a Process

When we think of various sources of wisdom, we often think of the “school of hard knocks.” Experience can be a good teacher, but a wise person prefers to learn from the good and bad experi­ences of others rather than having to learn every­thing the “hard way” himself. A wise person also reads the Bible, and when he reads, he asks God to help him truly understand what he’s reading and how to apply it. He asks God to help him see the connections between things, see the bigger picture. In other words, he asks God to make him wise.

 

Remember that wisdom is not out of reach, you just need to go to the right source, to the one who can give it to you. (James 1:5).

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Communication Skills for Men

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Ok, I’m definitely no expert but I have done research and have a desire to help men (including myself) to become the best husbands they can be. This post is about learning to communicate, because without good communication, our wives will feel isolated and misunderstood.

 

There is a problem when men use “guy-to-guy” communication on our wives, we just see things differently! Here are four things we can do to better communicate at home:

 

Learn to Listen

Generally, a lot of men decide what they think before they talk, while many women decide what they think while they are talking. So, for this reason, women need to know that they have been heard. So the wise husband will…

 

  • Seek out his wife when he comes home
  • Ask her about her day
  • Not take it personally if she’s upset
  • Ask questions they let her know that he is engaged

 

Do you hear her, but rarely listen? Do you listen carefully rather than superficially? Think about the things that you hear and can identify. Don’t allow the obligations of everyday life interfere with the treasure you have in your wife.

 

Refuse to Be Mr. Fix-It

When the women shares feelings, most husbands see this as a call to action (drop everything and come to the rescue). But she really just wants to be understood, and problem-solving is a secondary issue. She often wants to talk about the problem rather than solve the problem.

 

Give Reassurance

Silence and withdrawal are often seen as rejection, so stop it! If you have to leave for an appointment, give her a word of reassurance, like, “I’m going out for a while and will be back soon to pick up where we left off.” Simple acts of kindness, like holding her hand in the car or opening the door for her can communicate reassurance.

 

Ask For Her Input

This will definitely help her to stay connected. What do you think about…? How do you feel about…? She is a valued part of your life and she needs to feel that she is important to you.

 

Now, when she’s upset, do not fan the flames! How often is it that she is upset, so you also become upset? Resist the temptation. Keep your cool, allow her to vent. A great verse to follow is James 1:19.

 

Face it, husbands are far less communicative than wives, so it is important that men understand that the strong silent type is not the role model we need. Also, wives connect by sharing feelings, so don’t just seek to find solutions, try to give some understanding and reassurance.

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Minister in Your Workplace

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Perhaps you saw the Mel Gibson movie, The Passion of the Christ. It was all about last twenty-four hours of Jesus’ life. During one flashback scene, Jesus was in his carpentry shop making a table with his mother standing by playfully observing. It was a beautiful scene that reminded me that Jesus was a carpenter for most of his life. In fact, in the eyes of the people, Jesus was more qualified to be a carpenter than the Son of God. Jesus had a history of which they all knew. He was a young working class man from Nazareth.

 

I recently read Os Hillman as he comments on the public life of Jesus:

Consider that in the New Testament of Jesus’ 132 public appearances, 122 were in the marketplace. Of 52 parables Jesus told, 45 had a workplace context. Of 40 miracles in the book of Acts, 39 were in the marketplace. Jesus spent his adult life as a carpenter until age 30 before he went into a preaching ministry in the workplace. And, 54% of Jesus’ reported teaching ministry arose out of issues posed by others in the scope of daily life experience. Saint Bonaventure said, “His doing nothing ‘wonderful’ (his first 30-years) was in itself a kind of wonder.”

Work, in its different forms, is mentioned a lot in the Bible; more than all the words used to express worship, music, praise, and singing combined. God created work and He is a worker Himself (Gen 2:1-2). Adam is given a task way before the fall; he is to work the garden (Gen 2:15). Jesus tells us about the work of the Father, and that He, too, is to be at work (John 5:17).

My point is that the next time you are tempted to minimize your daily work as anything less than a holy calling, remember that Jesus was a minister in the workplace; a carpenter in his community. He has called you and me to reflect His glory in our everyday work.

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