First off, let’s check out what King David wrote in Psalm 22:14 that his heart melted like wax in the most inner places of his body / soul.
Have you ever asked yourself, “What’s the harm in keeping my fears and my emotional needs to myself?” Well, it’s because that which you use to hide your fears and emotional needs from others will eventually become your prison. It will lock you up, freeze you up, bottle you up… the bottom line is that it will keep you from moving toward possessing all that God has for you in your life.
- Some men turn to alcohol or drugs—in an effort to hide themselves from their fears and emotional needs.
- Some turn to porn or prostitutes—they won’t trust their wives with their emotions, but they’ll trust a total stranger with their bodies, their potential, and their reputations.
- Some turn to overwork—putting all of their energy into the job and “burning the midnight oil”—in an effort to avoid the need to relate to people.
Eventually, each of these “escapes” becomes a prison. It traps you even further into a cycle of secrecy, because once men are trapped by their particular escape mechanism, they won’t tell anybody about that trap either. Your fear only grows greater as your silence grows deeper.
The fact is, God created men with emotions. He created men with a need to feel, to touch, to express, to have an emotional outlet and release. Look at most any little boy… he is free to express himself, to vent his feelings, to hug and kiss and be hugged and kissed in return. He hasn’t yet learned to hide. Adam was hiding when God called to him; which turned out to be a learned response (Genesis 3:10).
- What happened to you on your way to becoming a man?
- Where are you?
- What caused you to feel that you need to run and hide?
There’s another man behind the mask we put up.
- He needs to be touched just as much as the next guy.
- He needs to be held.
- He needs to hear loving words, spoken in a gentle way.
Don’t deny your emotional needs. David wasn’t afraid to admit to himself and to God that he was weak, afraid, sorrowful, angry, or in need of love. He even said that his heart melted like wax (see Psalm 22:14). In fact, the entire twenty-second psalm is filled with emotion. It is a psalm of David, but it mirrors the experience of Christ’s crucifixion.
The Bible says Jesus was a man “who in the days of his flesh … offered up prayers and supplications with strong crying and tears” (Hebrews 5:7.) Jesus was a man who knew how to express His emotions.
- Tell God you need Him.
- Tell Him you love Him.
- Tell Him you are in trouble in your life.
- Tell Him where you ARE.