Scott Chafee – Page 32 – HeartQuest 101

What is Grief Work?

Posted on April 17, 2014 by Scott Chafee

Do you ever feel that your grief will never end … that your loss is a continual source of sorrow? Moving through the grief process takes time and commitment to “stay the course” until the goal of grief is accomplished.

Working through your grief is not an easy task; it is a difficult task that involves dedication. Be assured, God has a plan for you during this season of pain, and God will give you the strength to persevere through the pain. “You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised” (Hebrews 10:36).

Grief work involves a step-by-step process through which a grieving person walks in order to reach a place of emotional healing. “Though I walk in the midst of trouble, you preserve my life” (Psalm 138:7).

Healthy grief work will culminate in …

Accepting that the past will always be in the past
Accepting that the present offers stability and significance
Accepting that the future holds new and promising hope

In the end you can say, along with the apostle Paul, “We also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us” (Romans 5:3–5).
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Hunt, J. (2008). Biblical Counseling Keys on Grief Recovery: Living at Peace with Loss. Dallas, TX: Hope For The Heart.

What is Grief?

Posted on April 17, 2014 by Scott Chafee

Before one gets too far down the road, it is good to define a few terms that will come up on this journey of grief.

What Is Grief?

Grief is the painful emotion of sorrow caused by the loss or impending loss of anyone or anything that has deep meaning to you. “Be merciful to me, O LORD, for I am in distress; my eyes grow weak with sorrow, my soul and my body with grief” (Psalm 31:9). Grief begins in your heart as a natural response to a significant, unwanted loss.

Grief is a God-given emotion that increases with knowledge about the sorrows of life. The wiser you are about the grief that people experience, the more you yourself will grieve. “With much wisdom comes much sorrow; the more knowledge, the more grief” (Ecclesiastes 1:18).

In the New Testament, the Greek word lupe means “pain of body or mind.” When Jesus told His disciples He would soon be betrayed and killed, they were filled with grief. “The disciples were filled with grief” (Matthew 17:23).

What Is Mourning?

Mourning is the process of working through the pain of sorrow that follows a significant loss. “Joy is gone from our hearts; our dancing has turned to mourning” (Lamentations 5:15).

Mourning (also called grieving), is a normal, healthy process that lasts for a period of time. God uses mourning in order to produce the ultimate healing of deep distress and sorrow. “You turned my wailing into dancing; you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy” (Psalm 30:11).

Mourning evokes compassion and expressions of comfort from others. When Lazarus died, Jesus and many others came to comfort Mary and Martha. “Many Jews had come to Martha and Mary to comfort them in the loss of their brother” (John 11:19).

In the Old Testament, the Hebrew word abal means “to mourn or lament.” Jacob’s favorite son was Joseph. When Joseph’s brothers told their father, Jacob, that his favored son had been killed by a ferocious animal, Jacob went into deep mourning for days … and ultimately years. “Jacob tore his clothes, put on sackcloth and mourned for his son many days” (Genesis 37:34).

What Is Chronic Grief?

While we are grieving, a prevalent problem may be that we don’t want to talk about our grief or let others see our sadness. We don’t want to appear weak … so we mask our emotions! Yet if we delay sharing our sorrow, our healing will also be delayed. If we are going to be “authentically human,” we need to be able to share the truth about the heaviness in our hearts. If we have chronic grief, we are emotionally stuck, and we need to be set free. That is why Jesus’ words about truth are so freeing … even when applied to grieving. “You will know the truth, and the truth will set you free” (John 8:32).

Chronic grief is an unresolved, emotional sorrow experienced over a long period of time as the result of not accepting a significant loss or not experiencing closure of that loss. “The troubles of my heart have multiplied; free me from my anguish” (Psalm 25:17).

Chronic grief (or incomplete grief) can also be an unresolved, deep sorrow experienced over a long period of time and characterized by misconceptions that result in a failure to move through a grief process.

Misconception: “My grief will never end.”

Correction: You will mourn for a season, and then your grief will end. “[There is] a time to mourn and a time to dance” (Ecclesiastes 3:4).

Misconception: “If I cry, I’m not strong.”

Correction: Jesus was strong, yet He wept after Lazarus died. “Jesus wept.” (John 11:35)
King David was strong, yet he and his men wept after Saul and Jonathan died. “They mourned and wept and fasted till evening for Saul and his son Jonathan” (2 Samuel 1:12).

Misconception: “If I feel deep sorrow, I must not be trusting God.”

Correction: Christ, the Messiah, never failed to trust God, the Father, yet He was called “a man of sorrows.” “He was despised and rejected by men, a man of sorrows, and familiar with suffering” (Isaiah 53:3).

What Is Repressed Grief?

Have you seen someone smiling, yet within the smile you recognized sadness? Have you heard someone laughing, though you knew the heart was not healed? This is a picture of “repressed grief.” “Even in laughter the heart may ache, and joy may end in grief” (Proverbs 14:13).

Repressed grief occurs when a person has reason to grieve and needs to grieve, but does not grieve.

The person with repressed grief exhibits negative lifestyle patterns but does not know why. (Examples may be distancing from others, playing the clown, using mood-altering substances like alcohol or drugs, engaging in mood-altering behaviors like gambling or compulsive spending).

Only by facing the truth of your painful losses in life and by going through genuine grief will you have emotional healing. In the Bible, the Psalmist prayed this prayer … “Send forth your light and your truth, let them guide me” (Psalm 43:3).

Repressed grief can be overcome and grieving can begin when a person takes The Timeline Test.
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Hunt, J. (2008). Biblical Counseling Keys on Grief Recovery: Living at Peace with Loss. Dallas, TX: Hope For The Heart.

Bear Bryant’s Secret of Success

Posted on April 3, 2014 by Scott Chafee

Leadership is so important. Jesus was the greatest model of leadership and Ken Blanchard has developed seminars and written books on how we can Lead Like Jesus.

I recently read about legendary football coach of Alabama’s Crimson Tide, Bear Bryant, who once said: I’m just a plowhand from Arkansas, but I have learned how to hold a team together. How to lift some men up, how to calm others down, until finally they’ve got one heartbeat together, a team. There’s just three things I’d ever say:

If anything goes bad, I did it.
If anything goes semi-good, then we did it.
If anything goes real good, then you did it.

The Thief on the Cross

Posted on April 3, 2014 by Scott Chafee

Passion week is almost upon us. Luke 23:39-43 records the familiar death-bed conversion of the thief on the cross. I recently studied on this topic and discovered seven truths that the repentant thief understood. These truths must be embraced in order to gain peace with God. Here’s the passage:

One of the criminals who were hanged there was hurling abuse at Him, saying, “Are You not the Christ? Save Yourself and us!” But the other answered, and rebuking him said, “Do you not even fear God, since you are under the same sentence of condemnation? “And we indeed are suffering justly, for we are receiving what we deserve for our deeds; but this man has done nothing wrong.” And he was saying, “Jesus, remember me when You come in Your kingdom!” And He said to him, “Truly I say to you, today you shall be with Me in Paradise.”

So, here are the seven observations:

The repentant thief recognized the brevity of this life: He understood the temporary nature of life because he knew he was dying. There is biblical support for this knowledge (Psalm 103:15-16; James 4:14). We also should be concerned about what happens to us when this life ends.
The repentant thief understood the reality of the afterlife: He understood that life after death was just as real as this present earthly life. This explains why he spoke with such confidence about Christ’s coming kingdom (Luke 23:42). Scripture teaches the reality of the afterlife, because God has designed part of man to live forever (Ecclesiastes 3:11). All people will exist forever, either with God in his kingdom or forever separated from him in a place of conscious torment (Daniel 12:2; Matthew 25:46).
The repentant thief understood his guilt before God: He understood this fact when he said, “And we indeed are suffering justly, for we are receiving what we deserve for our deeds” (Luke 23:41). While he was a criminal being punished for his crimes, the Bible is clear that we all are sinners, “For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God” (Romans 3:23).
The repentant thief understood the uniqueness of Jesus Christ: He understood Jesus to be God, according to Luke 23:40, “But the other answered, and rebuking him said, ‘Do you not even fear God?'” He further understands Jesus by saying, “but this man has done nothing wrong” (Luke 23:41). Christ was sinless perfection and was different than any man he had ever encountered. Jesus is not one among equals, but the unique God-Man (John 8:58-59; 20:30-31; Revelation 19:16).
The repentant thief understood that Christ had the power to save him: He understood his own guilt, but he also understood that this extraordinary man, Jesus, could do something to save him. “Jesus, remember me when You come into Your kingdom!” (Luke 23:42). Jesus had the ability to help people with their primary problem: their guilt and sin before a Holy God. The solution to this sin problem is found in Christ alone (John 14:6; Acts 4:12; 1 Timothy 2:5).
The repentant thief understood that he could not be saved through his own good works or any act of self-righteousness: Since this thief was nailed to a cross, he understood there were no acts of self-righteousness he could perform. He could not join a church, do good deeds, or even be baptized. He was in a helpless position; just like us. We cannot do anything to merit God’s favor. God sees our acts of self-righteousness as filthy rags, if we are using them to gain favor from Him (Isaiah 64:6).
The repentant thief understood that it is never too late to ask God for salvation: He knew his death was imminent, yet he still believed it was not too late to cry out for mercy and receive the divine grace the Jesus offers. Jesus gave him immediate assurance of salvation, “Truly I say to you, today you shall be with Me in Paradise” (Luke 23:43).

No matter what you have done, or how long you have lived, or how close you are to death, it is never too late to ask God for salvation (2 Corinthians 6:2b). However, once you die and you pass into the eternal realm, then it is too late (Luke 16:19-31; Hebrews 9:27).

Here is the challenge for all of us today:

Do you know these spiritual realities?
Do you understand the brevity of this life?
Do you understand the reality of the afterlife?
Do you understand your personal guilt before God?
Do you understand Christ’s uniqueness and power to save you?
Do you understand the ineffectiveness of self-righteousness?
Do you understand that it is not too late to trust Christ for salvation?

If so, do what the repentant thief did and trust in Christ alone for your salvation.

[print_link] [email_link] [adapted from Dr. Andy Woods]

Who Would Not Taste Death?

Posted on April 2, 2014 by Scott Chafee

I have been taking a course on the Commands of Jesus and one section dealt with the command to “Be Ready.” One end times passage of Scripture is a part of the eschatological verses of Jesus, found in Mark 13:30, where Jesus said “this generation will not pass away until all these things take place.”

This question had a dramatic influence on Albert Schweitzer when he was studying New Testament theology. Jesus said, “This generation will not pass away until all of these things come to pass… You will not go over all the cities of Israel until all of these things come to pass… Some of you will not taste death until all of these things come to pass.”

Schweitzer looked at those passages, and he thought of them as obvious cases where Jesus blew it, where Jesus expected his return in the first century. Schweitzer saw this expectation of the early return of Jesus in early writings of Paul. Then there was an adjustment in the later writings of the Bible to account for the great disappointment that Jesus didn’t show up in that first generation. That’s been a matter of great consternation for many people.

Jesus didn’t say, “Some of you aren’t going to die until I come back.” He said, “Some of you will not taste death until all of these things come to pass.” The difficulty lies in the structure of the Greek language. The disciples are asking Jesus about the establishment of the kingdom. Jesus talks about two distinct issues.

He talks about what obviously involved the destruction of Jerusalem when he said that the temple would be destroyed.
Then at the end of the Olivet discourse, he talks about his return on clouds of glory.

Some of the best New Testament scholarship that I’ve seen is on the meaning of the Greek words translated “all of these things.” An excellent case can be made that when Jesus used that phrase, “these things” of which he was speaking pertained to the destruction of the temple and of Jerusalem. It’s amazing that Jesus of Nazareth clearly and undeniably predicted one of the most important historical events in Jewish history before it took place. This wasn’t just a vague Nostradamus or Oracle of Delphi type of future prediction; Jesus vividly predicted the fall of Jerusalem and the destruction of the temple, which indeed took place in A.D. 70, while many of his disciples were still alive. It was also before the missionary outreach had reached all of the cities of Israel and before that generation had, in fact, passed away. Those cataclysmic events that Jesus had predicted on the Mount of Olives did, indeed, take place in the first century.

Jesus also says in Mark 9:1, there are “some standing here who will not experience death before they see the kingdom of God come with power.” The same could be said here, how would those with Jesus see the kingdom of God come with power? Are we talking about the end times, the rapture, or the millennial kingdom? Look again in context, Mark 9:2-13 is the story of the transfiguration where the three disciples standing with Jesus would indeed experience a glimpse of Jesus in the kingdom, in a shining glorified state.

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Prayer in Private

Posted on April 2, 2014 by Scott Chafee

A. W. Tozer wrote an interesting piece on prayer that has to do with our personal prayer times at home. This basically comes down to integrity, the man we desire to be when no one is looking. Look at Daniel as our example.

Now when Daniel knew that the writing was signed, he went home. And in his upper room, with his windows open toward Jerusalem, he knelt down on his knees three times that day, and prayed and gave thanks before his God, as was his custom since early days.—Daniel 6:10

Thomas a’ Kempis wrote that the man of God ought to be more at home in his prayer chamber than before the public….

No man should stand before an audience who has not first stood before God. Many hours of communion should precede one hour in the pulpit. The prayer chamber should be more familiar than the public platform. Prayer should be continuous, preaching but intermittent.

It is significant that the schools teach everything about preaching except the important part, praying. For this weakness the schools are not to be blamed, for the reason that prayer cannot be taught; it can only be done. The best any school or any book (or any article) can do is to recommend prayer and exhort to its practice. Praying itself must be the work of the individual. That it is the one religious work which gets done with the least enthusiasm cannot but be one of the tragedies of our times.

[print_link] [email_link] [God Tells the Man Who Cares, 70-71.]

What About Manifestation Gifts?

Posted on March 24, 2014 by Scott Chafee

I have a respected friend who is on staff at a church where the pastoral leadership has differing interpretations on the miracle or sign gifts that were a part of the early church’s experience. This will eventually cause the congregation to personally decide where each member stands on the issue.

When I was in seminary, I had a friend who was a part of an Apostolic Church, where speaking in tongues was the norm, and EVIDENCE of a believer having the Holy Spirit. They even had small group classes on “how to speak in tongues” during the week, like you can coach the “gift of the Spirit” out of someone… but I digress.

The question is whether or not these types of gifts (tongues, miracles, word of wisdom or knowledge) are a part of the church today. Those who say YES are considered charismatic (embracing the grace gifts, charis meaning grace), and those who say NO are considered cessationists (those who believe tongues and healing have ceased, or stopped at the end of the apostolic age). So, is cessationism biblical?

Most cessationists believe that, while God can and still does perform miracles today, the Holy Spirit no longer uses individuals to perform miraculous signs.

The Bible shows that miracles occurred during particular periods for the specific purpose of authenticating a new message from God.

Moses was enabled to perform miracles to authenticate his ministry before Pharaoh (Exodus 4:1-8).
Elijah was given miracles to authenticate his ministry before Ahab (1 Kings 17:1; 18:24).
The apostles were given miracles to authenticate their ministry before Israel (Acts 4:10, 16).
Jesus’ ministry was marked by miracles, which the Apostle John calls “signs” (John 2:11). John’s point is that the miracles were proofs of the authenticity of Jesus’ message.

After Jesus’ resurrection, as the Church was being established and the New Testament was being written, the apostles demonstrated “signs” such as tongues and the power to heal. “So you see that speaking in tongues is a sign, not for believers, but for unbelievers.” (1 Corinthians 14:22a, a verse that plainly says the gift was never intended to edify the church).

The Apostle Paul predicted that the gift of tongues would cease (1 Corinthians 13:8). Here are six reasons that it has already ceased:

The apostles, through whom tongues came (Acts 2:1-4), were unique in the history of the church. Once their ministry was accomplished, the need for authenticating signs ceased to exist.
The miracle (or sign) gifts are only mentioned in the earliest epistles, such as 1 Corinthians. Later books, such as Ephesians and Romans, contain detailed passages on the gifts of the Spirit, but the miracle gifts are not mentioned, although Romans does mention the gift of prophecy. The Greek word translated “prophecy” means “speaking forth” and does not necessarily include prediction of the future.
The gift of tongues was a sign to unbelieving Israel that God’s salvation was now available to other nations. (1 Corinthians 14:21-22 and Isaiah 28:11-12).
Tongues was an inferior gift to prophecy (preaching). Preaching the Word of God edifies believers, whereas tongues does not. Believers are told to seek prophesying over speaking in tongues (1 Corinthians 14:1-3).
History indicates that speaking in tongues ceased. Tongues are not mentioned at all by the Post-Apostolic Fathers. Other writers such as Justin Martyr, Origen, Chrysostom, and Augustine considered tongues something that happened only in the earliest days of the Church.
Current observation confirms that the miracle of tongues has ceased. If the gift were still available today, there would be no need for missionaries to attend language school. Missionaries would be able to travel to any country and speak any language fluently, just as the apostles were able to speak in Acts 2.

Regarding the miracle gift of healing, Scriptural observation tells us that healing was associated with the ministry of Jesus and the apostles (Luke 9:1-2), and we see that as the era of the apostles drew to a close, healing, like tongues, became less frequent. The Apostle Paul, who raised Eutychus from the dead (Acts 20:9-12), did not heal Epaphroditus (Philippians 2:25-27), Trophimus (2 Timothy 4:20), Timothy (1 Timothy 5:23), or even himself (2 Corinthians 12:7-9). The reasons for Paul’s “failures to heal” are

The gift was never intended to make every Christian well, but to authenticate apostleship.
The authority of the apostles had been sufficiently proved, making further miracles unnecessary.

The reasons stated above are evidence for cessationism. According to 1 Corinthians 13:13-14:1, we would do well to “pursue love,” the greatest gift of all. If we are to desire gifts, we should desire to speak forth the Word of God, that all may be edified.

[ Read more at www.gotquestions.org ]

Sheep Are Led, Not Driven

Posted on March 18, 2014 by Scott Chafee

I was recently reading some A. W. Tozer on leadership; very sobering and needed in American cultural Christianity…

Cattle are driven; sheep are led; and our Lord compares his people to sheep, not to cattle.
It is especially important that Christian ministers know the law of the leader—that he can lead others only as far as he himself has gone.

Oh come, let us worship and bow down; let us kneel before the Lord our Maker. For he is our God, and we are the people of His pasture, and the sheep of His hand.—Psalm 95:6-7

The minister must EXPERIENCE what he would teach or he will find himself in the impossible position of trying to drive sheep. For this reason he should seek to CULTIVATE his OWN heart before he attempts to preach to the hearts of others.

If he tries to bring them into a heart knowledge of truth which he has not actually experienced he will SURELY FAIL. In his frustration he may attempt to drive them; and scarcely anything is so disheartening as the sight of a vexed and confused shepherd using the lash on his bewildered flock in a vain attempt to persuade them to go on beyond the point to which he himself has attained.

The law of the leader tells us who are preachers that it is better to cultivate our souls than our voices. It is better to polish our hearts than our pulpit manners, though if the first has been done well and successfully it may be profitable for us to do the second. We cannot take our people beyond where we ourselves have been, and it thus becomes vitally important that we be men of God in the last and highest sense of that term.

[ The Price of Neglect, 151-153 ]

Way of the Master Evangelism

Posted on March 18, 2014 by Scott Chafee

The “Way of the Master” evangelism method is a technique developed by TV-show hosts Ray Comfort and Kirk Cameron, which seeks to witness to the lost by application of the Mosaic Law to show men their sin and ultimately bring them to conviction and subsequent repentance.

Way of the Master witness encounters are typically initiated with the question “Do you consider yourself to be a good person?” When the individual answers positively, the evangelist will walk him or her systematically through the Law:

How many lies do you think you have told in your life?
Have you ever stolen something, irrespective of its value?
Have you ever taken the Lord’s name in vain?
Have you ever looked at a woman with lust?

Then there is a brief summation of the individual’s admissions and the question is asked concerning the individual’s eternal well-being: “In light of your own admission, if God were to judge you by the standard of the ten commandments, do you think you would be found innocent or guilty and would you be going to heaven or hell?”

This is followed by a summary of the key elements of the gospel, with particular emphasis on doctrines such as propitiation and the need for faith and repentance.

Biblical support for this method includes such passages as…

Romans 3:19-20 – “Now we know that whatever the law says, it says to those who are under the law, so that every mouth may be silenced and the whole world held accountable to God. Therefore no one will be declared righteous in his sight by observing the law; rather, through the law we become conscious of sin”
Galatians 3:24-25 says – “…the law was put in charge to lead us to Christ that we might be justified by faith. Now that faith has come, we are no longer under the supervision of the law.”
Psalm 19:7 also proclaims that “the law of the Lord is perfect, converting the soul.”

As the Apostle Paul puts it in Romans 3:21-26 – “But now a righteousness from God, apart from law, has been made known, to which the Law and the Prophets testify. This righteousness from God comes through faith in Jesus Christ to all who believe. There is no difference, for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus. God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood. He did this to demonstrate his justice, because in his forbearance he had left the sins committed beforehand unpunished – he did it to demonstrate his justice at the present time, so as to be just and the one who justifies those who have faith in Jesus.”

[print_link] [email_link] [ from GotQuestions.org ]