REAL Leadership

This week I had been approached about the possibility of doing a series on leadership. There are certainly plenty of resources available so I thought we’d take a look at the top leadership guy, John Maxwell. I went to a REAL Leadership conference years ago and thought some of the things learned would benefit the Men of Steel in their professional lives as well as their families.

REAL stands for Relationships, Equipping, Attitudes and Leadership. Let’s take a look at Relationships:

Why are relationships important? They are the glue that holds team members together. Solid relationships are built upon mutual respect (you can’t make someone feel important if he secretly feels like a nobody), shared experiences (you can’t be relational with someone you don’t know), trust (as you respect people and spend time with them, trust develops), reciprocity (one-sided relationships don’t really last) and mutual enjoyment (as relationships grow, people begin to enjoy one another).

What do we need to know about others? People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care. I generally agreed with this statement until my friend Craig (an anatomy professor at the medical school in Norfolk) said “until you’re looking for a surgeon.” Great point!

Why do people fail to understand others? Fear (fear can be in most work environments, we must give others the benefit of the doubt and replace fear with understanding), Self-centeredness (this is natural for people, so try to see from the other person’s perspective), failure to appreciate differences (a team is no good if they all have the same skills, we need people who have talents that we don’t have), failure to acknowledge similarities (put yourself in the other person’s shoe and ask how you’d handle the situation).

Things everyone needs to understand about people.

  1. Everybody wants to be somebody. We want to be regarded by others, to do something significant. Treat people as if they are important.
  2. Nobody cares how much you know until they know how much you care. People are your greatest asset, so love them, do good, be honest, help them, if better is possible, to do good is not enough.
  3. Everybody needs somebody. Contrary to popular opinion, there are no self-made men or women Ecclesiastes 4:9-12. Give honor to those who helped you get where you are today.
  4. Everybody can be somebody when somebody understands and believes in them. Go out of your way to make people feel special. Invest in them. Everyone has the potential to become important in the lives of others.
  5. Anybody who helps somebody has the potential in influence a lot of bodies. You can impact a lot of people! The nature of influence seems to multiply.

Choose this day that you will seek to understand others. How will this impact your marriage, your family, your work environment? Next time I’ll write about the building blocks of relationships.

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