Help Your Kids Pick Good Friends

I was reading the Lifeway magazine “Living with Teenagers” (Feb 2009) and it’s full of great information this month. One article on finding friends I find exceptionally noteworthy today:


Your teenager may have a couple hundred friends on his Facebook page, but how does s/he find real friends? How can parents help?


  • Reflect on your own friends when you were a teen.
  • Understand it takes some time.
  • Get to know your teenager’s friends and pray for them.
  • Help them to see that God is relational and created us to connect with others (Matthew 22:37-39).
  • Help them think through the qualities of a good friend; perhaps define the word “friend.”
  • Share examples of poor friends:
    • Shallow friends (Proverbs 18:24),
    • Foolish friends (Proverbs 13:20, Proverbs 14:17),
    • Mean girls – and boys (Proverbs 12:26),
    • Gossiping friends (Proverbs 16:28, Proverbs 20:19),
    • Volatile friends (Proverbs 22:24-25),
    • Fair weather friends (Proverbs 17:17).


Measure how good a friend you are (each question is worth 10 points):


  1. ____ I haven’t passed on any gossip this week; I keep things to myself.
  2. ____ I am a good listener; I make eye contact and ask follow-up questions.
  3. ____ I am even-tempered; I don’t explode or withdraw when upset.
  4. ____ I am happy for people, not threatened, when they succeed.
  5. ____ I feel sad when others (including those I don’t like) fail.
  6. ____ I have the skills to be honest about things that bother me in a relationship; when I’m honest the problem is usually resolved.
  7. ____ I appreciate someone who is honest with me; I receive it gracefully.
  8. ____ I take appropriate responsibility for my behavior.
  9. ____ One of my strengths is picking the right kind of friends.
  10. ____ I can avoid foolish and wicked people without creating a scene.


How’d you do? The closer to 100 you are, the better friend you are! Ask your friends to take the test with you in mind and see how the two compare.


Related Images:

Spread the Community, Faith, Love

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Time limit is exhausted. Please reload CAPTCHA.