Author: Scott Chafee

Scott serves on staff at King’s Grant Baptist Church in Virginia Beach.

Responding to Conflict Biblically

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These are my notes from a seminar on resolving conflict, based on a book by Ken Sande, available at Amazon.

The Peacemaker’s Pledge:

  1. Glorify God – instead of focusing on our own wants and desires, let’s focus on seeking to please God and honoring and obeying him.
  2. Get the log out of your own eye – instead of focusing solely on the faults of the other person, focus on my part in all of this and how I might grow and change my attitudes and behavior.
  3. Go and show your brother his fault – instead of pretending the other person does not exist or overlook his offenses, focus on talking directly to the other person in a biblical manner.
  4. Go and be reconciled – instead of accepting premature compromise or allow the relationship to wither, focus on pursuing peace and reconciliation, forgiving as Jesus would.

Understanding Conflict and Our Responses to it:

  1. What is conflict?
    1. A difference in opinion or purpose that frustrates someone’s goals or desires.
    2. In a fallen world, conflict is inevitable and should be expected (Romans 3:10-18, James 4:1-3, Acts 15:1-2, 36-39).
  2. What causes conflict?
    1. Misunderstandings (Acts 15:22-29)
    2. Differences in values, goals, gifts, calling, priorities, expectations, interests, or opinions (1 Corinthians 12:12-31).
    3. Competition over limited resources (Genesis 13:1-12).
    4. Sinful or selfish attitudes and desires that lead to sinful words and actions (James 4:1-3).
  3. God provides a way to deal with conflict.
    1. Many believers have only a devotional theology for conflict resolution.
    2. To be a peacemaker, we need a systematic theology that resolves conflict in a biblical manner.
    3. We are guided by the Peacemaker’s Pledge, the four G’s.
    4. We are inspired and empowered by what God has already done and continues to do for us.
      1. We are powerless in our own strength (Romans 7:15).
      2. The foundation for peacemaking and reconciliation is our justification by God’s grace through faith in Christ (Romans 3:24, John 14:27, 2 Corinthians 5:17-21, Ephesians 2:8-9, Philippians 2:1-4, Colossians 1:20, 3:12-15).
      3. Jesus is our perfect model of a peacemaker: he died for us while we were yet sinner (Romans 5:8, Philippians 2:5-11), he suffered wrongs without retaliation (1 Peter 2:23), he confronted others for their good (John 4:1-26), he loved and forgave even his enemies (Luke 23:34). He promises to work in us so that we may do the same things (Philippians 2:13, Colossians 3:15).
  4. How do we respond to conflict?
    1. Escape response – on one end of the spectrum (designed to get away from the pressure).
      1. Denial – pretend the conflict does not exist or refuse to deal with it properly.
      2. Flight – run away from the person with whom you have conflict (which is appropriate if someone is in danger).
      3. Suicide – which is always the wrong response to conflict.
    2. Attack responses – on the other end of the spectrum (designed to bring pressure on your opponent to defeat them).
      1. Litigation – a matter is taken to civil authorities for a decision.
      2. Assault – use force or intimidation to force submission.
      3. Murder – which is always the wrong response to conflict.
    3. Conciliation responses – on the middle area of the spectrum (designed to find just and mutually agreeable solutions to conflict). The first three are personal, the latter three are communal.
      1. Overlook an offense – walk away and forgive (Proverbs 19:11, 12:16, 17:14, 1 Peter 4:8, Colossians 3:13).
      2. Discussion – personal offenses are resolved through confession or confrontation, leading to forgiveness and reconciliation (Matthew 18:15, 5:23-24, Galatians 6:1-3, Proverbs 28:13).
      3. Negotiation – substantive offenses are resolved through a bargaining process to reach a mutually agreed upon settlement, involving compromise and collaboration (Philippians 3:3-4).
      4. Mediation – one or two others will meet with the parties to improve communication and facilitate a resolution (Matthew 18:16). Solutions can only be suggested.
      5. Arbitration – When the parties cannot come to a voluntary solution, the arbiter has the power to render a binding solution.
      6. Church discipline – When a Christian party refuses to do what is right and just, the church family intervenes to promote repentance and reconciliation (Matthew 18:17-20). Note that relationship is more important than worship (Matthew 5:23-24).

Conflict Provides Opportunities:

  1. To glorify God – show him honor and respect, bring him praise, to be a witness for what he has done in your life.
    1. Trust him (Psalm 37:5-6).
    2. Obey him (John 14:15).
    3. Imitate him (Ephesians 5:1-2).
  2. To serve other people.
    1. Help carry their burdens (Galatians 6:2, 10).
    2. Help them change through constructive confrontation (Galatians 6:1).
    3. Teach and encourage others by example (1 Timothy 4:12, Titus 2:7).
  3. To grow into the image of Christ (Romans 8:28-29, 2 Corinthians 3:18, James 1:3-4, Romans 5:3-4, Hebrews 12:7-13).
    1. Conflict humbles us to remember our need for God (2 Corinthians 12:7-10).
    2. Conflict confronts us to uncover sinful attitudes and habits (Psalm 119:67, 71).
    3. Conflict provides an opportunity of cast off the old self through repentance and faith, and put on the new self created to be like Jesus (Ephesians 4:22-24).
    4. Conflict helps us practice godly habits (1 Timothy 4:7, Hebrews 5:14). Remember the ABC’s (Adversity Builds Character).
  4. Opportunity, leads to Responsibility, which leads to Stewarding (a biblical approach to conflict). Stewarding requires an accurate view of God.
    1. If you believe that God is limited in power or his love is inconsistent, you will find it difficult to trust and obey his commands. Now you will take matters into your own hands.
    2. Since God is omnipotent, omniscient, immutable, and omnipresent, he is unlimited and in charge. (Isaiah 46:10, Daniel 2:20-22, 4:34-37).
    3. God is also all-loving, holy, just, gracious, good, merciful, and faithful. He is for us (Psalm 62:11-12, Isaiah 43:2-3, Matthew 10:30-31).
    4. Therefore, all that happens does not take God by surprise (Matthew 10:29-30, Exodus 4:10-12, Proverbs 16:4-5, Acts 2:23, 1 Thessalonians 3:3, 1 Peter 4:12-19, Genesis 45:5, 50:20, Daniel 3:16-18).
    5. Stewarding means trusting that God is always up to something good, even when his purposes are not clear (Deuteronomy 29:29).
    6. Stewarding views conflict as an assignment, not an unfortunate accident.
    7. Stewarding focuses on faithfulness more than results (Matthew 25:21, Luke 12:42-47, John 12:24-26).

Peacemaking is Not Optional: (Romans 12:18)

  1. Three dimensions of peace.
    1. Peace with God (Colossians 1:19-20, Romans 5:1-2).
    2. Peace with other people (Romans 12:18).
    3. Peace within ourselves (Isaiah 32:17, 48:18, 26:3, Romans 3:20-22, Matthew 22:39).
  2. Jesus’ reputation depends on peace and unity.
    1. The priestly prayer of Jesus (John 17:20-23).
    2. The command of Jesus (John 13:34-35).
    3. The worship of Jesus (Matthew 5:23-24).
  3. Make every effort – Ephesians 4:1-3, Romans 15:5-7, 1 Corinthians 1:10, Galatians 5:19-22, Colossians 3:13, 15, 1 Thessalonians 5:13-15).
  4. Conflict resolution inside the church, not the courts (1 Corinthians 6:1-8).
    1. It’s a bad witness.
    2. It ignores the root problem.
    3. It does not bring peace or reconciliation.
  5. Peacemaking is not optional (Matthew 5:9).

Is This Really Worth Fighting Over? (Proverbs 19:11)

  1. Two kinds of “logs” to remove.
    1. A critical negative attitude that leads to unnecessary conflict.
    2. An actual sinful words and actions.
  2. Overlooking minor offenses (Proverbs 12:16, 19:11, 17:14, 1 Peter 4:8, Colossians 3:13).
    1. Why? To imitate the Lord (Psalm 103:8-10)
    2. When? If the offense is not dishonoring to God, if your relationship has not been permanently damaged, if others are not being hurt.
  3. Change your attitude (Philippians 4:2-9).
    1. Rejoice in the Lord always (Philippians 4:4).
    2. Let your gentleness be evident to all (Philippians 4:5).
    3. Replace (cover or control) anxiety with prayer (Philippians 4:6-7).
    4. See things as they truly are (Philippians 4:8).
    5. Practice what you have learned (Philippians 4:9).
  4. Count the cost (Matthew 5:25-26).
  5. Remember the rights and privileges given by God (1 Corinthians 10:31-11:1, Matthew 25:24-27). This R does not stand for rights, but responsibility (to glorify God, serve others, to grow into the likeness of Christ).

Examine Yourself: (Proverbs 28:13)

  1. Take an honest look at yourself (Psalm 139:23-24)
  2. Repentance is more than a feeling.
    1. Mere remorse leads to further grief (2 Corinthians 7:10).
    2. Godly sorrow comes when we see sin for what it is, a personal offense against God (Luke 15:18, Genesis 39:9, Psalm 51:3-4).
    3. Genuine repentance involves a change of heart and a new way of thinking (Luke 15:17, Isaiah 55:7-8).
    4. Genuine repentance leads to changed behavior (Acts 26:20, Matthew 3:8) resulting in confession, repair, and change.
    5. The benefits of confession and genuine repentance.
      1. Clear conscience before God.
      2. The first step toward constructive change.
      3. Sets an example for others to follow.
  3. The seven A’s of confessions – never make a confession just to get a burden off your shoulders.
    1. Address everyone involved (Psalm 41:4, Luke 19:8).
    2. Avoid if, but, and maybe (Psalm 51).
    3. Admit specifically what you did.
      1. Sinful attitudes (Matthew 15:19, James 3:13-4:12, 1 John 2:15-17).
      2. Sinful words – reckless words (Proverbs 12:18, 15:1), complaining or grumbling (Philippians 2:14, James 5:9), Deception or twisting (Exodus 20:16, Proverbs 24:28), gossip (Proverbs 11:13, 16:28, 20:19, 26:20, 1 Timothy 5:13), slander (Leviticus 19:16, 2 Timothy 3:3, Titus 2:3), worthless talk (Ephesians 4:29).
      3. Sinful actions – not keeping your word (Matthew 5:37, Psalm 15:1, 4), not respecting authority (Mark 10:42-45, Romans 13:1-7, 1 Peter 2:18-25), not treating others like you want to be treated (Matthew 7:12).
    4. Apologize expressing sincere sorrow for how you affected the other person.
    5. Accept the consequences (Luke 15:19, Numbers 5:5-7, Luke 19:8).
    6. Alter your behavior (Ephesians 4:22-32).
    7. Ask for forgiveness (Genesis 50:17).
    8. Allow time – OK, there’s an eighth A.

When Should You Go and Confront Someone?

  1. When someone has something against you (Matthew 5:21-24)
    1. You may be able to clarify a misunderstanding.
    2. You may learn that you were actually wrong.
    3. You may help to deliver the other person from the bitterness of unforgiveness.
  2. When someone’s sins are too serious to overlook (Matthew 18:15)
    1. Is it dishonoring to God? (Romans 2:21-24).
    2. Is it damaging to your relationship?
    3. Is it hurting other people (including you – Luke 17:2-3, 1 Corinthians 5:6)?
    4. Is it hurting the offender?
  3. Issues of confrontation.
    1. You are not to be a busybody (2 Thessalonians 3:11, 1 Timothy 5:13, 2 Timothy 2:23)
    2. You should not listen to excuses for not confronting someone.
      1. The Bible says not to judge (Matthew 7:1-5)
      2. Isn’t God the one who will show someone they are wrong? (2 Samuel 12:1).
      3. Confrontation is needed when someone is caught in a sin (Galatians 6:1).
      4. The purpose of confrontation is to restore the offender to usefulness to God (Galatians 6:1).
    3. The same principles apply to non-believers (Galatians 6:10).
    4. The same principles apply to persons in authority (2 Samuel 12:1).
  4. Communication skills.
    1. Speak only to build others up (Ephesians 4:29).
    2. Listen carefully – waiting (Proverbs 18:13), concentrating (Matthew 7:12), clarifying (Are you saying? Would you give me an example?), reflecting (From your perspective, I was wrong. You really care about this issue), agreeing (You’re right, I should have… A lot of what you say is true. I understand how you feel).
  5. Elements of effective confrontation (Proverbs 12:18).
    1. Prayer.
    2. Choose the right time and place.
    3. Believe the best about the other person until you have the facts that prove otherwise (1 Corinthians 13:7).
    4. Talk in person whenever possible (Matthew 18:15).
    5. Plan your words.
    6. Use a gracious tone of voice and friendly body language.
    7. Be objective (facts vs. personal opinions or conclusions).
    8. Use the Bible carefully (don’t preach).
    9. Ask for feedback.
  6. Recognize your limitations (Romans 12:18, 2 Timothy 2:24-26).
    1. Your job – speak the truth in love as clearly and persuasively as possible.
    2. God’s job – to change the hearts and minds of other people.

When Should I Involve Other People? (Matthew 18:16)

  1. After you have attempted step one – to overlook minor offenses.
  2. After you have exhausted step two – to talk in private.
  3. Step three: take one or two others with you. The key is “refuses to listen.”
    1. Mutual agreement.
    2. Unilateral request.
    3. What do conciliators do?
      1. They encourage self-control and courtesy.
      2. They ask questions and clarify facts.
      3. They counsel and admonish by God’s Word.
      4. The expand resources.
      5. They observe and report to churches.
    4. What is the opponent is not a believer? (Galatians 6:10).
  4. Step four: tell it to the church (Matthew 18:17).
  5. Step five: treat the other person as a non-believer (Matthew 18:17-20, 1 Corinthians 5:1-6, 2 Corinthians 2:5-11, 2 Thessalonians 3:14-15, Titus 3:10-11).
    1. “As” means a functional decision, not a heart decision.
    2. Treat sinners like Jesus treated sinners – love them enough to tell them the truth.
    3. The purposes of church discipline:
      1. To prevent dishonor to God (Romans 2:23-24).
      2. To protect the purity of the church, preventing the offender from leading others into sin (1 Corinthians 5:1-13, Matthew 18:16).
      3. To restore the offender, leading them toward repentance (Galatians 6:1, Matthew 12:20, Acts 3:19).
    4. When to go to court?
      1. If you have exhausted church remedies (Matthew 18:15-20, 1 Corinthians 6:1-8).
      2. If you are asserting biblically legitimate rights (not all rights are right).
      3. If you have a righteous purpose (so count the cost). Will it glorify God, benefit others, and is it necessary?

Forgive As God Forgave You (Ephesians 4:32)

  1. Forgiveness is not a feeling, nor forgetting, nor excusing (at first).
  2. Forgiveness is a decision.
    1. The major penalty of sin: personal separation (Isaiah 59:2, Romans 6:23).
    2. Forgiveness releases us from this penalty (Ephesians 2:13, Jeremiah 31:34, Psalm 103:12).
    3. Four promises modeled after God’s forgiveness (Matthew 6:12, Colossians 3:13, Ephesians 4:32, 1 Corinthians 13:5, Psalm 130:3-4).
      1. I promise I will not think about this incident.
      2. I promise I will not bring up this incident and use it against you.
      3. I promise I will not talk to others about this incident.
      4. I promise I will not allow this incident to stand between us hinder our personal relationship.
    4. When you forgive, you tell them the real source of their forgiveness is Jesus Christ, and promised to forgive when we confess (1 John 1:9).
  3. When should you forgive? (Luke 17:3, Mark 11:25, Luke 6:37).
    1. The ideal biblical response to sin: repentance, confession, restitution, and change.
    2. Promise #1 – forgiveness
      1. Conditional – a commitment made to the offender.
      2. Ideally, after repentance and confession.
      3. Minor offenses may be forgiven even if there is no confession or repentance.
      4. Major offenses – these promises may be delayed until the problem is resolved following Matthew 18.
  4. What are the consequences?
    1. There is a time for mercy (Matthew 18:21-25, Luke 15:21-32).
    2. There is a time for consequences (Psalm 99:8, Proverbs 19:19, Numbers 14:20-23) Forgiveness of personal offenses does not necessarily release a person from the material consequences of their actions.
  5. Overcoming unforgiveness.
    1. Unforgiveness will separate you from God (Matthew 18:35, Mark 11:25).
    2. Renounce sinful attitudes and unrealistic expectations (Ephesians 4:32, Colossians 3:13).
      1. Expecting the offender to earn or deserve forgiveness.
      2. Desiring to punish the offender.
      3. Demanding a guarantee.
    3. Remember that our baptism into Christ and experience God’s daily forgiveness (Matthew 18:21-35).
    4. Draw on God’s strength (Philippians 2:13).
  6. Reconciliation and the replacement principle.
    1. Reconciliation means that the relationship is restored at least to the condition it was before the conflict arose (Matthew 5:23-24, 6:12, 2 Corinthians 2:5-11, 5:18-21).
    2. Reconciliation usually take deliberate work.
    3. The replacement principle (Luke 6:27-28, Leviticus 19:18, Ephesians 4:22-24).
      1. In thought (Philippians 4:8).
      2. In word (Romans 12:14).
      3. In deed (Romans 12:20).
    4. It’s not forgive and forget, but forgive TO forget.

A Biblical Approach to Negotiating (Philippians 2:1-4)

  1. Cooperative vs. competitive negotiation.
    1. Competing is appropriate in some cases, but neglects the problems and needs, results in inadequate solutions, is inefficient, and damages relationship.
    2. Cooperating is preferred (Matthew 7:12, 1 Corinthians 10:24, 13:4-5, Matthew 22:39).
  2. When you negotiate – PAUSE.
    1. Prepare.
    2. Affirm relationships.
    3. Understand interests.
    4. Search for creative solutions.
    5. Evaluate options objectively and reasonably.
  3. Prepare (Proverbs 14:8, 22) – Pray, get the facts, identify issues and interests, study the Bible, seek godly counsel, anticipate reactions, pick a good time and place, and plan your opening remarks.
  4. Affirm relationship (show respect and concern) – communicate in a courteous manner, spend time on personal issues, exercise authority with restrain, submit to authority in a godly manner, seek to understand the other’s point of view, look out for the interests of others, confront in a gracious manner, allow face saving, and give sincere praise and encouragement.
  5. Understand interests (1 Samuel 25:24-31, 32-35) Issue (an identifiable and concrete question), position (a desired outcome or definable perspective on an issue), and interest (what motivates people and gives rise to positions; a concern, desire, need. limitation, and something the person values).
  6. Search for creative solutions (Proverbs 14:8, Daniel 1:11-13)). When brainstorming, separate inventing from deciding, no idea is out of bounds.
  7. Evaluate options, don’t argue – look for God’s truth (Psalm 19:7, 111:10), get objective facts (Daniel 1:11-16), seek objective opinions from trusted advisors (Proverbs 12:15, Matthew 18:16), look behind the opinions of others and deal wisely with their opinions and objections, and the last resort (Matthew 18:15-20, 1 Corinthians 6:1-8, Romans 12:17-13:7).

Dealing with Unreasonable People (Romans 12:21)

  1. We have supernatural weapons (2 Corinthians 10:3-5, Luke 6:27-28, Ephesians 6:10-18).
  2. Control your tongue (Romans 12:14, 1 Peter 2:15).
  3. Seek godly advisors (identify with others, avoid being isolated – Romans 12:15-16).
  4. Keep doing what is right (Romans 12:17, 1 Peter 2:12, 15, 3:15-16, 1 Samuel 24).
  5. Recognize your limits (Romans 12:18-19).
  6. The ultimate weapon: deliberate, focused love (Romans 12:20-21, Luke 6:27-36).
    1. Demonstrate love (Romans 5:8, 1 John 3:16).
    2. Doing good can protect you from your own bitterness and resentment.
    3. Doing good can help to bring another person to repentance.

How to Teach the Bible

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Dr. Lucien Coleman, Jr. has a book by this same title (How to Teach the Bible, 1979) and this page contains my personal notes and observations on Bible teaching.

Bible Basics for Teachers:

  1. Christian teaching is a divine calling. It is ministry and a practice that has been passed down for centuries. Teachers of the Bible are a part of a noble crowd. It is for everyday church members, not just for the well-trained professionals.
  2. God-called teachers need training. There is no substitute for competence (2 Timothy 2:15). The Bible teacher needs an arsenal of resources that will help one dig into the text, draw out the meaning, and relate it to life.
  3. Teaching skills are improved with practice. We learn by doing. We learn best by teaching. The teacher always gets more out of the lesson that the students can absorb.
  4. There is no substitute for basic training in the craft of teaching. We must walk before we can run. We must take piano lessons and practice before we can perform a recital. We cannot go to war without basic training, which is the key to competence, confidence, and effectiveness.
  5. The Bible is central to Christian teaching. Bible teaching is more than Christian ethics, morality, doctrine, theology, church history, missions, and holy living. All of these are rooted in the Bible itself. We will not understand these topics without understanding the Bible.
  6. Teaching is a combination of knowing, being, and doing. Bible teaching is more than just knowing your textbook or the subject matter. The teacher enthusiasm for the task, warmth in relationships, and sesitivity to personal needs are as important as the lesson itself.

What is Bible Teaching?

  1. Teaching is guiding. The teacher is not the one who has all the answers and knowledge of the subject, but more of a guide along the journey.
  2. Teaching is gardening. Rather than growing plants, the Bible teacher is growing people. The teacher will create an environment to stimulate growth. The teacher will till the soil and make it ready to receive the seed. God is the one who causes the growth (1 Corinthians 3:7), so, 1) God has created human being with a remarkable capacity for learning; the gardener must understand basic laws of nature. 2) God provides a rich resource for Christian learning in this biblical revelation, the Bible; it is our only source for faith and practice. 3) God functions as our guide, in the Holy Spirit, to motivate, illuminate, and provide insight.
  3. Teaching as biblical interpretation. If we continue in his Word, we will be his disciples, and we will know the truth, and the truth will make us free (John 8:31-32). Biblical knowledge is mandatory for the Christian. When did we make spiritual growth optional? So, interpretation is essential; understanding what the text says, what did it mean to the first readers, and what does it mean for us today?
  4. What Bible teaching is NOT. 1) Presenting lessons. 2) Imparting information. 3) Telling students what the teacher knows. 4) The performance of a teacher.
  5. Teaching and learning are inseparably related (like a carpenter’s work results in a structure of some kind, a chef work results in food on the table). No teacher can transmit learning (the teacher does all he can to encourage learning – the learner learns on his own). Teachers are co-laborers with God (We partner with God to enhance learning of our students).

What Do Teachers Do?

  1. Building a learning climate.Learning can be influenced by our surroundings and our mood.
  2. Planning and preparing learning activities. Just like we prepare a grocery list for our meals, the Bible teacher prepares ahead of time for anticipated learning. 1) Decide what is to be taught (the lesson may emphasize one thing but you know your students better than the curriculum’s author). Look for the take-away or main point you want your students to get. 2) Plan the learning activities (like starting on a journey, your first decide on the destination, and then everything is done to get you there).
  3. Leading class sessions. How? 1) Motivating learners (build interest by making the information relevant). 2) Guiding learning activities (carefully drafting questions, using visual aids, exploring hands-on activities, maximizing case-studies, finding newspaper articles, telling stories and modern parables). 3) Evaluating learning (always check the target to see if you hit it. What changes can be made? How can we make this better?).

The Teacher’s Knowledge of the Bible

  1. Rightly handling the Word of truth (2 Timothy 2:15). Be a student of the Bible. Read it. Know it. Get into it and let it get into you.
  2. The historical approach to biblical interpretation. Anchor the text in the context of the original writer and reader.
  3. Look at the forest, then the trees. We must understand the context of the book (written by whom, for whom, when, cultural context, historical context, main doctrinal themes).
  4. Use the Bible to interpret the Bible. We are not dependent on outside source, the Bible has great commentary on itself, and we have other tools to help us dig out relevant truth with cross-references and study Bible notes.
  5. Developing a reservoir of Bible knowledge. Don’t just study up on the latest lesson, but build your repertoire of knowledge.

The Teacher’s Knowledge of the Learners

  1. The teacher-learner transaction. I’ve heard it said that we don’t teach the Bible, we teach persons. The author says this is a half-truth; we teach Bible truths to persons.
  2. Meeting learners where they are. Remember your classroom participants (educated or not, young or old, long-time believers or not, Christian background or not, know their needs, hopes, desires, dreams, values).
  3. Where the Bible touches life. What is the take-away? Where does the lesson connect to life? What is the objective of the lesson? Ask at the end of each lesson, “So what?”

The Teacher’s Knowledge of Teaching – Principles

  1. People will try harder to learn when the learning gives them pleasure, satisfied needs, or promises to be useful.
  2. In learning groups, the level of participation is higher when teaching activities are directed to the whole person. People are more than just ears and mind and heart. Learning does not happen apart from the total person and their experiences.
  3. Goal-centered teaching is more efficient than teaching that has no particular purpose. A study on the Ten Commandments is not as effective as application of the principles presented.
  4. Learners are more likely to participate in learning activities when the teacher establishes an appropriate, “ready, set…” to get them ready for the lesson. Ask questions designed to grip the imagination. Pose a hypothetical situation. Introduce conflicting ideas. Tell a dramatic story. Play
  5. When a teacher uses questions, they should vary in form, scope, and level of difficulty. I like the opening, dig, and apply sections the “devil’s advocate.” I like using the method of open, dig, explore, and apply.

How to Study for a Lesson

  1. Blessed is the early starter. Why wait? Read the passage early in the week and let God work on you all week. Don’t just study the lesson, get into the Word and connect with it and with God. 1) Few of us can do our best work under pressure or at the last minute. 2) We can never estimate how long it will take to prepare a lesson and gather supplies for the experience. 3) Starting early lets you search for examples and resources that are unavailable to the tardy. 4) When we don’t have time to prepare, we tend to fall back to our familiar teaching patterns and methods. 5) Creative teaching requires time.
  2. Tools of the trade. 1) The Bible of course, since it is our only source for faith and practice. Utilize the chain-references and study notes. 2) Bible study helps. Bible dictionaries and commentaries and great tools. Online reference like Blue Letter Bible and Got Questions are wonderful. 3) Church supplied curriculum. Much of this is good and doctrinally sound, but it takes work to make the lesson prepared months ago by someone who does not know our people and our situation, to make it relevant to the events of today.
  3. Studying the lesson. 1) Read the passage devotionally. what does it say to you? How is God speaking to you? 2) Read the passage analytically. Go through the passage with a keen eye, looking for things that jump off the page. Mark up the text, underline words, put notes, cross-references, and observations in the margin, look up parallel passages, be familiar with the context information. 3) Use study tools. Concordance, commentaries, dictionaries, reputable websites, word studies, names and meanings, Bible atlas. Don’t rely totally on the curriculum materials. 4) Then pull it all together.

Teaching With Purpose

  1. Acquiring simple factual Bible knowledge. Beatitudes. Ten Commandments. Who was the father of King Solomon? Name a synoptic gospel.
  2. Acquiring systematic factual Bible knowledge. Know Bible history. Knowing Elijah was a prophet is one thing, but knowing where he fit into Israel’s history of the divided kingdom is quite another. We should understand the genre of literature found in the Bible.
  3. Understanding doctrinal themes. The Bible has a remarkable unity, even though written over 1500 years, by 40 writers from kings to tax-collectors, in three languages. Doctrine includes theology about God, mankind, salvation, the Spirit, the church, spiritual beings, even revelation itself.
  4. Mastering techniques of the Bible. The teacher will train students in Bible knowledge so they become competent in biblical understanding. Help your students to use the available tools.
  5. Learning principles of interpretation. We will interpret prophecy, parables, history, and poetry differently.
  6. Drawing rules of conduct from the Bible. We must understand cultural ways of biblical times. The danger is that we can embrace faulty behavior by looking at negative examples in the Bible as normative. Since Paul does not condemn slavery, are we to assume that slavery is then biblical? In Christ we know that owning another person is not right although it is biblical. Polygamy is not right even though it is biblical. Sacrificing your children to Molech is not right even though it is biblical.
  7. Developing biblical attitudes. I call this developing a biblical worldview. It is primarily recognizing there is a creator God, who is one God in three persons, the Bible is our only source for faith and practice, there are only two genders, marriage from the start was one man and one woman for a lifetime, Jesus paid the penalty for the debt we could not pay. We take seriously the sermon on the mount, the great commandment, and the great commission. We take seriously Romans 12. We take seriously Philippians 2.

Essential Ingredients

  1. Stimulating interest in the lesson.
  2. Leading the Bible study.
  3. Highlighting eternal truths.
  4. Applying the lesson to life.
  5. Previewing the next lesson.

Teaching Methods

  1. Expository and inquiry. Expository seeks to pull out the meaning from the text, putting out information and setting forth ideas. Inquiry is different since learners will conduct and inquiry of the text, to seek into the passage to see what they might discover. The first method is where the teachers has the information to be shared and the latter has the seekers discovering the information together.
  2. Cognitive and affective learning. Cognitive learning takes place through teaching methods which stimulate thinking, remembering, evaluating, and reasoning. Affective learning has to do with attitudes we learn from other people. We catch attitudes from other people.

Generating Enthusiasm for Bible Study

  1. Build a spirit of fellowship. Christian fellowship and Bible study go hand in hand (Acts 2:42, 2 Corinthians 8:4, Philippians 1:5, 3:10, 1 John 1:3). So, class size will either help or hinder this dimension.
  2. Personify enthusiasm. A group tends to take on the characteristics of the leader. There is something contagious about someone who is excited about the study and the topic!
  3. Get class members involved. 1) Can we involve member in class administration, like create ministry assignments, for outreach, refreshments, phone list, fellowship, service projects? 2) Can we involve members in the learning activities, like divide into micro-groups to discuss a topic? 3) Can we involve members in class projects? This is certainly outside of the Bible study hour, and promotes fellowship, outreach, and service. 4) Magnify persons. Recognize accomplishments and events in the lives of members.
  4. Old fashioned public relations. Communicate by every means (telephone, text, posters, e-mail, cards, social media, announcements, newsletter).
  5. Let’s not grow weary (Galatians 6:9). We all get tied but press on toward the goal, the prize of the upward call of God (Philippians 3:13-15).

Summary

  1. It is a sin to bore your class. Be enthusiastic about what this study means to you and to them.
  2. The spread of Christianity and the teaching of Scripture have been connected to the outward expansion of the gospel and the inner vitality of the church.
  3. As teachers, you have been called to an extremely important mission. It’s more than teaching a class; you are fulfilling the great commandment and the great commission, helping people to love God, love his Word, and love others.
  4. This calling requires a high degree of commitment, which is the price tag on Bible teaching.
  5. This calling is significant, since it transforms lives.
  6. This calling requires us to be faith, not necessarily successful.

Setting Our Priorities for 2022

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Welcome to this last Sunday of 2021, as we look forward to and make plans for 2022. My message starting point is Acts 20:22… and you may be thinking, I see what you’ve done there… 2022, anyway, let’s look at what Dr. Luke writes. Paul is addressing the Ephesians elders in this chapter…

Acts 20:22 – And now, behold, bound by the Spirit, I am on my way to Jerusalem, not knowing what will happen to me there, 23 except that the Holy Spirit solemnly testifies to me in every city, saying that bonds and afflictions await me. 24 But I do not consider my life of any account as dear to myself, so that I may finish my course and the ministry which I received from the Lord Jesus, to testify solemnly of the gospel of the grace of God.

Just as Paul wrote these words 2000 years ago, we are also setting out on a journey into 2022, not knowing what is in store, other than we continue to be a part of a world that doesn’t care much about the God we serve or want him to be found anywhere in the public square. Christians are prime targets for negative press, especially after there has been some sort of public failure done by some mega-church or a high-profile popular pastor. Sometimes the church gets a black eye because of how church people behave. I pray every day for my integrity and Christian witness to match my personal faith.

For much of the world, the gospel still is illegal or brings significant persecution in many parts of the world. According to Open Doors USA, their World Watch List for 2021 has information on the top 50 countries where it is difficult to follow Jesus. Most of the persecution comes from communist oppression, local clan oppression, and Islamic oppression.

So, to put this into context, Paul set his priority to go to Jerusalem in spite of what awaited him there. But for most of us, we just want to be a faithful witness for the Lord making a difference in our circles of influence. Basically, we want to bloom where we are planted. I have said it before, but it bears repeating, we will never make a difference in our culture if we don’t embrace the mission of Jesus with intentionality.

The Great Commission and the Great Commandment will not manifest itself in our lives by accident. So, in this week of making resolutions, what commitments are we willing and ready to make for the cause of Christ, and to demonstrate our faith in Christ?

Paul writes these words and includes what I call a mission statement. Perhaps you have chosen a Bible verse to reflect your desire to live life on mission with God.

  • Some people have chosen Galatians 2:20 – I have been crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself up for me.
  • Others might choose Matthew 6:33 – But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.
  • For me personally, I have chosen Acts 20:24 – But I do not consider my life of any account as dear to myself, so that I may finish my course and the ministry which I received from the Lord Jesus, to testify solemnly of the gospel of the grace of God.

At the end of all things in this life, may people remember that I chased after God with my whole heart and took seriously the calling he has on my life to faithfully testify to the gospel of God’s grace.

What about you? I challenge you to find a verse that sums up your desire to follow Christ with your whole heart, soul, mind, and strength.

Here we are at the very end of 2021, so, what changes can we make for 2022? I’m going to help you consider adding a few things to your New Year’s resolutions, or at least modify your life-priorities list. And yes, there’s an acrostic… F.A.I.T.H.

I have chosen this acrostic because faith appears to be an important part of the Christian experience. For example…

  • And without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is and that He is a rewarder of those who seek Him. (Hebrews 11:6) Notice the word, “impossible” to please him.
  • Or how about Second Corinthians 5:7, that says, for we walk by faith, not by sight.

So, with my acrostic FAITH, let me suggest five ways we can set priorities for 2022.

Faith in God

I think most of us would like to be remembered as a person of great faith. A couple of times in the New Testament, Jesus was amazed at the faith of the people.

One time Jesus was entering Capernaum and was approached by a centurion whose servant was lying paralyzed at home and racked with pain (Matthew 8:5-10). Jesus tells him that he will come and heal him, only to hear the Roman officer tell him that he is not worthy for Jesus to enter his home, but just say the word and my servant will be healed.

When Jesus heard this, he was amazed because he had not seen such great faith in all the land of Israel. He tells him to go home because what he believed has happened. Jesus marveled at this man’s faith. I want to be that guy, that Jesus would say, “of all the people following me, that Chafee guy has great faith. He believes what is written in that book we call the Bible. He trusts me with his life, his future, his salvation, and his daily decisions.”

But, there was also another time when Jesus was amazed at people’s faith. It was also in Galilee, in his hometown of Nazareth (Mark 6:1-6). He was teaching in the synagogue and the people were astonished, saying, “where did he get these things, his wisdom and the miracles? Is this not the carpenter, the son of Mary?” At the end of this story, Mark tells us that Jesus was amazed (or he marveled or wondered) at their unbelief. It appears that familiarity really does breed contempt. They were so familiar with Jesus and his earthy family that they couldn’t see him for who he was, the Savior of the world, the Messiah, the promised Deliverer.

Great faith was found in a Roman centurion Gentile while among the chosen people of God, the Jews, there was a deafening lack of faith that even prevented Jesus from doing many miracles in their midst.

Which guy do you want to be? In 2022, will you grow into a person of great faith, or will Jesus be unable to do anything through you because of unbelief?

Remember that without faith, it is impossible to please God (Hebrews 11:6). So, our first priority in 2022 is to develop into a person of strong faith. But faith cannot stand on its own. Faith must be acted upon, or it is simply a belief. So, here is our next priority…

Action for God

James is very specific when it comes to faith and action. In James 1:22, he tells us, But prove yourselves doers of the word, and not merely hearers who delude themselves. Did you catch that? Faith must be proven, and it is proven through actions. He goes on to write in James 2:17-18, Even so faith, if it has no works, is dead, being by itself. 18 But someone may well say, “You have faith and I have works; show me your faith WITHOUT the works, and I will show you my faith BY my works.”

On a practical level, faith that is not proven is not really faith. Think about it. I may have faith that this chair will hold me up but unless I am willing to sit down on it, there is no faith, there is only belief.

I’m sure you have heard this story at some point in your life but there was this high-wire walker who stretched his wire across Niagara Falls and walked from one side to the other, and back again. The crowd was amazed at what this guy could do. He then told the crowd he would do it again, but this time pushing a wheelbarrow, all the way across, and back again. He then asked a question of his raving fans, “Do you believe I can go one more time with someone sitting in the wheelbarrow?” and they all cheered that he could. Then came the tough question that separates faith from simple belief, “Who will get in this wheelbarrow and go with me?”

This next year, how will you grow your faith and step forward in action? What is God asking you to do by saying, “Just trust me. Have faith. Walk in obedience and let me take care of you.” This action step will move you from simply believing the right stuff about Jesus, to trusting him with your life and future. Let’s grow in 2022.

The next priority helps us to develop credibility among the people in our circles of influence. Nothing will honor God more than his people BEING the disciple we are called to be, rather than just CLAIMING to be his disciples. This involves living for God and walking in obedience even no one is looking. It’s about walking in integrity with God…

Integrity with God

How often do we slide into sin simply because we know that no one else is watching? This is about a businessman traveling in a strange city and knowing that no one will ever know what he might be doing after hours. It’s about the movies we stream or the images we see on our smartphone that no one will ever know about. It’s about flirting with someone not your spouse knowing that your work life and personal life will never intersect with church people.

I’m reminded about the story of David who found himself in the wrong place at the wrong time and made the wrong decision. We read about this episode in King David’s life in 2 Samuel 11. The king was not where he was supposed to be, off at war with his troops. He was at home, on his rooftop, and discovered a beautiful woman next door. After a series of poor choices, this “man after God’s own heart” walks down the path of lust, adultery, and eventually conspiracy and murder.

Remember that no one ever starts out to destroy their life or family or marriage, but like David, we make a series of poor choices and lack the necessary accountability to someone else, that essential relationship we need to keep ourselves on the narrow path of God’s will.

Why am I such an advocate of men’s ministry? Because deep inside every one of us is the potential to compromise our beliefs. There is strength and safety in numbers. Why would I not do everything in my power to keep myself on the right path?

And this is not just about men’s ministry, because our women get together on Tuesday morning and Tuesday evenings (as well as at other times through the year) to grow in faith, support one another, pray for one another, love on one another, and to bear one another’s burdens.

  • Here is a great verse that supports personal accountability, Proverbs 27:17 – Iron sharpens iron, So one man sharpens another. The Men of Steel embrace this verse and want to be the sharpest knife in the drawer. Sharp knives don’t happen by accident, it takes work.
  • Remember that this godliness doesn’t happen by accident. Check out the foundation of our Noble Man Group, Isaiah 32:8 – But the noble man devises noble plans; And by noble plans he stands.

So, do you desire to stand when all those around you fall? It’s about being intentional with your spiritual growth. This passage tells us to devise a PLAN. And how can we devise a plan without using good material? That’s where the Bible comes in. We walk with Jesus by allowing his Word into our heart; we must embrace teaching about God.

Teaching About God

The Bible is our only source for faith and practice, so how effective can we expect to be when we don’t get into God’s Word? Ignorance is not bliss when it comes to the Bible. When I stand before a holy God, I’m not sure that saying, “I never knew” will be a good excuse.

We have more access to God’s Word than any previous generation. We have multiple copies of God Word in our homes. We have access to dozens of different translations in the palm of our hands. The YouVersion Bible app has been installed on over 500 million devices worldwide – and it’s totally free (as of November 2021).

Will this be the year that you get involved in a small group? There’s nothing like getting together to open the Bible and discuss what it means and how it applies to life. Spiritual truth is so relevant to life.

A lot of people generally avoid Bible study because they don’t know much about that mysterious book, but I submit to you… does that argument make any sense? If you DON’T know that much about the Bible, why would you NOT get involved in a small group.

It’s almost like saying, “I’m not going to college because I don’t know much about my chosen major.” Students go to college to learn. They’re not there because they’re an expert. Same thing about being a disciple of Jesus. The word disciple literally means pupil, learner, student, not master or expert.

The point of our life in Christ is to conform to the image of Jesus over a lifetime. That’s what we call, the process of sanctification. If we say YES to Jesus, get baptized, and join the church, and the only thing we do from that point is sit on a pew a couple of times a month (or for some, a couple of times a year) we are missing the point of being a Christian.

Christianity is not just a belief system but it’s embracing another worldview. Now that our faith is in Christ, how we view the world comes from what we read in the Bible. It’s called having a biblical worldview. We take everything we learn from the world and hold it up to the teachings found in the Bible. And with a biblical worldview, we trust what the Bible says over what our present culture teaches. God’s truth does not go out of style; he doesn’t change with the times. We don’t make God into OUR image; we are made in HIS image.

Teaching from God happens best in the context of a small group of believers who are on the same journey in life, together. We read, learn, discuss, and seek to apply the teaching we receive from God’s Word. If you’re not a part of a small group, you are not in a position to be all that you can be as a follower of Christ. Maybe this is the year when you surrender to God’s will and get involved in a small group.

If you’re already involved in a small group, maybe your next step is to teach others about God. It is an interesting fact that when you teach others, God opens up your mind and heart to learn so much more than you could ever teach to your class. It really is a blessing to teach others, a privilege, and a responsibility.

Hey, none of us is an expert on the Bible, but every time I open this book, I put myself into a position to hear from God through his Word and through the indwelling Holy Spirit. Which leads us to the final priority for 2022…

Hearing from God

The Scripture is full of language like, “If anyone has ears to hear, let him hear” (Matthew 11:15, 13:9, 15, 16), “He who has an ear, let him hear what the spirit says to the churches” (Revelation 2-3), and “For the heart of this people has become dull, And with their ears they scarcely hear, And they have closed their eyes; Otherwise they might see with their eyes, And hear with their ears, And understand with their heart and return, And I would heal them.”’ (Acts 28:27).

It is totally possible to have a keen sense of hearing and still not hear from God. Often times we are just satisfied to live on the fringe of God’s influence and involvement in our lives. If heard it said, “If you can live without revival in your life or church, you will.” How much time do we spend on chasing after God? Like, if we don’t hear from him, we are ruined?

Sometimes we settle for a casual glance in God’s direction and feel that is all God wants from us. But there is so much more if we would only chase after him. And he’s NOT playing some cosmic hide-and-seek game because his Word tells us in Jeremiah 29:13, “You will seek me and find me, when you search for me with all your heart.”

Not everybody gets it. When you hear from God, you know it. People around you may never understand you stepping out in faith, but from God’s perspective, you will be a success in the kingdom of God, even if those around you can’t see it. God wants our faithfulness, so we leave the definition of success up to him.

So, how will we be successful in 2022? Perhaps setting a few priorities will help us journey toward exercising greater faith… have…

  1. Faith IN God
  2. Action FOR God
  3. Integrity with God
  4. Teaching ABOUT God, and
  5. Hearing FROM God

What area do you need to grow in faith right now? How can your church family help you? What commitments are you ready to make right now? Let’s talk to God about it…

PRAY: Lord Jesus, this time is yours. You know our hearts, motivation, and attitudes. You know where we fall short better than we know ourselves. As we enter this new year, may we rekindle our passion for you, your Word, and the mission you have in our lives. Help us to live a life of significance. Help us to know your will and your ways and give us the courage to stand up for the cause of Christ.

Thank you for being a part of this online service. If we can help you in any way, please reach out to us through the church website (kgbc.us/more). If you live in the Virginia Beach area, we invite you to stop by for a visit on Sundays at 9am or 11am or join us for midweek activities on Wednesday evenings (kgbc.us/midweek). Until next time, thanks for joining us. We hope to see you soon.

How to BLESS Other People

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On November 7, Scott talked about how we can be a blessing to other people. The base passage was Genesis 12:1-3 but we found a lot of Scripture to support this blessing lifestyle.

1 Go forth from your country, And from your relatives And from your father’s house, To the land which I will show you; 2 And I will make you a great nation, And I will bless you, And make your name great; And so you shall be a blessing; 3 And I will bless those who bless you, And the one who curses you I will curse. And in you all the families of the earth will be blessed.” – Genesis 12:1-3

The B in BLESS means Begin with Prayer – make a list of those for whom you are praying on a regular basis – And He was saying to them, “The harvest is plentiful, but the laborers are few; therefore beseech the Lord of the harvest to send out laborers into His harvest.” – Luke 10:2

The L in BLESS is for Listen – discover who they are and where they are by asking questions and listening – This you know, my beloved brethren. But everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger; – James 1:19

The E in BLESS is for Eat – share a meal with someone each week in hopes of getting to know them better – And it happened that He was reclining at the table in his house, and many tax collectors and sinners were dining with Jesus and His disciples; for there were many of them, and they were following Him. – Mark 2:15

The First S in BLESS is for Serve – seeks ways to serve them in some way, demonstrating your love for them – For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life a ransom for many. – Mark 10:45

The Second S in BLESS is for Story – you have two stories to share: YOUR story (which is your testimony) and HIS story (which is the gospel, the plan of salvation) – but you will receive power when the Holy Spirit has come upon you; and you shall be My witnesses both in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and even to the remotest part of the earth. – Acts 1:8

The Masks We Wear

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On October 31, Scott talked about the Masks We Wear, from Romans 12:9-13. It’s fun to pretend to be something we know we are not in real life. However, pretending to be someone or something we are not must never be a way of life, especially in the church. We tend to hide behind the masks we wear, because if you knew the real me, you wouldn’t like me, and I’m not ready to take the risk of the pain of rejection.

M is for MEETING – we must be connected to one another relationally, socially, emotionally, and spiritually, and this is best done in the context of a small group experience.

A is for ACCOUNTABILITY – we must be connected to other followers of Christ who will hold us accountable for our spiritual life, marriage, and integrity.

S is for SACRIFICE – we know it will cost us something to live out our Christian faith. We live out our faith inside the church and outside in the community.

K is for KNOWLEDGE – we must seek to know all we can about living faithfully as a member of the body of Christ rather than believing that old saying, “ignorance is bliss.”

S is for SALVATION – we must embrace the fact that when we are saved by grace through faith in the finished work of Christ on the cross, we now have a responsibility to act on that faith (to live it out) in front of a lost and dying world.

We showed this video at the beginning of the message:

Strengthening Your Mind

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As Ken has been teaching in this series, we are reminded that the mind is the ultimate battlefield in this life. The Lord, our own flesh (that negative base side of who we are) and the enemy (the devil or Satan) are all battling for control of our mind. Why does the battle rage here in the mind? Because the Bible says, “For as a person thinks in his heart, so is he…” Proverbs 23:7, NASB.

We need to understand that the battle that’s raging in the mind is a spiritual battle. Ultimately, it’s a battle between good and evil for the control of our lives. Since this is a spiritual battle, we cannot fight in our own strength or use the common weapons of warfare, we must fight with spiritual resources, like what we find in 2 Corinthians 10:3-5; Ephesians 6:10-18.

Today, I want you to know that…

  1. You don’t have to LOSE this battle for your mind!
  2. You don’t have to be DEFEATED in your walk with Christ.
  3. You don’t have to BE A SLAVE of worry, anxiety, your thoughts, feelings, or fear.
  4. You don’t have to BE CONTROLLED by the desires of the body!
  5. However, you CAN live your life under the control of the Holy Spirit, which allows you to win this battle for your mind!

How, might you ask? The first thing you need to know is that it doesn’t happen automatically! You have to take certain steps that will ALLOW IT to happen in your life, (Romans 12:2; Ephesians 4:23; 1 Peter 1:13).

As we take the steps in 1 Peter 1:13 to “think clearly and exercise self-control,” we put ourselves in a position where the Lord can renew the mind. The word “transform” in Romans 12:2 and the word “renewed” in Ephesians 4:23 are both in the passive voice. They are something done TO and IN the child of God.

Secondly, we need to know that we don’t have to do this alone. We have the Lord’s promise in 2 Timothy 1:7, that God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and love and a sound mind, (or discipline). So, today, I want to take these few verses in Philippians 4 to show you Paul’s plan for victory in the battlefield of the mind.

I want to share with you five simple steps that teach us all about Strengthening the Mind. If followed, these steps will help us to build a wall of protection around our minds. These steps will help us to achieve victory in the daily struggles that we all face.

  1. BUILD THE WALL OF PRAISE (Philippians 4:4) – Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice!

This repeated phrase in Philippians is Paul’s command for believers to “rejoice.” He uses this word in the imperative form, and it’s also important to note that he immediately repeats the command. This word means, “to be glad.” While not a Greek scholar, I discovered that this word is in the present tense, active voice, and imperative mood. All that means is, the believer is commanded to “keep on being glad in the Lord.”

Now, let’s face it, life is tough, and the events of modern life don’t bring much happiness! But let’s put this into context. When Paul penned these words, he was chained up between two Romans soldiers while in a prison cell. Even in the midst of this hardship, Paul knew that regardless of the circumstances of life, God never changes, God never leaves, and God never forsakes us. That’s why we are told to “rejoice in the Lord.” We don’t rejoice in the circumstances, he says to rejoice “in the Lord.” You see, people will change, circumstances will change, and life constantly changes, but the Lord never changes! He is constant, he is faithful, and he will always walk through this life right beside us.

Since this is true, we can learn to rejoice in who He is, what He has done for us, and what He is doing in our lives. Even if the road is hard, remember these facts…

  1. God has a detailed plan for your life, Psalm 37:23.
  2. God has promised to make all things work for good, Romans 8:28.
  3. God has promised to go with you through everything in life, Hebrews 13:5.
  4. God has promised you abiding victory, 1 Corinthians 15:57; Romans 8:37.
  5. God has promised you that the destination will be worth every step of the way, Romans 8:18; 2 Corinthians 4:17.

Therefore, even when you can’t be happy about your life, learn to be happy in the Lord! Build this wall of praise around your mind! So our first step is to build a wall of PRAISE.

  1. BUILD THE WALL OF PATIENCE (Philippians 4:5) – Let your gentle spirit be known to all men...

The word “gentle” literally means “considerate or gracious spirit.” It has been translated in a variety of ways:

  • New Living translates the word “considerate”
  • Holman translates the word “graciousness”
  • King James translates the word “moderation”
  • The ESV translates the word “reasonableness”

This word has the idea of being patient with other people; or yielding to the rights and wishes of others. It does NOT mean we make compromises in our doctrinal beliefs in the name of tolerance, but it does mean that you have a willingness to take the back seat in favor of other people. This is the same idea that Paul introduces back in Philippians 2:4 – thinking of others as more important than yourself.

Paul is saying that the reality of our faith should be demonstrated in how we treat other people. If the focus of our lives is all about US, then when people hurt us, we’ll have a desire to retaliate and get even.

Paul wants us to take the focus off ourselves and put it onto other people. When we are focused on the people around us, we’ll be less likely to be hurt by what other people do. What they say won’t sting us so badly because we are not focused on ourselves. How they act can be passed over more easily when we focus on THEIR hurts, their situation, or their well-being. It has been said that “hurting people hurt people.” So, when people hurt us, we ought to seek to discover what is happening in THEIR life to have behaved the way they did. I’m not saying it’s easy, but it is the right thing to do.

When we adopt the mentality of self-love (which is all around us) we will always look at the things people do and say, as a personal attack. It will cause us to wear our feelings on our sleeves and to be more easily hurt by the words and actions of others.

This will also cause us problems in the mind because we dwell on WHAT was done or WHAT was said. If we can learn to accept other people just as they are and overlook what they have done to hurt us, it will protect our mind from dwelling in negative areas. It will build a wall of protection around the mind that others cannot penetrate!

The bottom line is this, if we can learn to live in genuine contentment, as in Philippians 4:11, then it won’t matter what anyone says or does to us. The mind will be protected from the evil that it likes to find in others. The devil loves nothing better than to get your eyes off Jesus and onto the faults of other people! The flesh loves nothing better than to go along with the devil in accusing others and judging others. When this happens, the mind is in danger! So, our second step is to build the wall of PATIENCE.

  1. BUILD THE WALL OF PRAYER (Philippians 4:5b-7) – The Lord is near. Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. 7 And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Philippians 4:6 warns us against the dangers of worry. The word used for anxiety in the NASB, is translated in other places as “careful” or “worry.” The idea of “anxiety” comes from the term, “to be troubled with cares.” It refers to a state of mind that is agitated over the events and circumstances of life. There is nothing wrong with HAVING concerns (we all have them) but it’s when your concerns have YOU, that’s when the problems begin to spring up!

Worry is so dangerous because it allows the mind to create false ideas about God, others, and the world around us. Worry says, “God is dead!” or, “If there is a God, he obviously doesn’t care about me and my situation.” Both of those statements are false! God is certainly alive, Hebrews 7:25, and God does care, Hebrews 4:15; 1 Peter 5:7.

When the problems of life come our way, we are given some wonderful help in these verses.

  1. The Lord is near (Philippians 4:5b) – This refers NOT only to his second coming, but that He is always near to His children – Hebrews 13:5-6.
  2. Exercise the tool of prayer (Philippians 4:6) – Paul speaks of prayer, supplication, and requests. These might be thought of as, 1) general praying, 2) specific praying, and 3) detailed praying. The main point of this verse is that instead of worrying, the believer is to demonstrate his faith in the POWER and the WILL of God by seeking the Lord in prayer!
  3. Develop a thankful heart (Philippians 4:6) – Regardless of the situations you face in life, learn to praise the Lord through ALL of them. Nothing brings God nearer (or drives the devil away any faster) than a genuinely thankful heart!

The Lord’s promise to us is that He will replace our worries with HIS PEACE when we come before Him in trusting, humble prayer. The word “keep” or “guard” in Philippians 4:7 means “to garrison, or build a fort around, or to post a military guard.” The Lord promises to post a guard around the heart and mind of the person who trusts Him with the needs of everyday life. Instead of worrying yourself sick about things you can’t change, learn to lean on the Lord in prayer! Build this wall of prayer!

  1. BUILD THE WALL OF PURITY (Philippians 4:8) – Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things.

Ken talked about this verse at the beginning of this series, so I won’t go too far into this point, but all of these words Paul uses in this verse are a clear picture of the Word of God. God’s Word is true – John 17:17. Since the Bible is true, everything it says fits within these categories mentioned by Paul. It is honorable, it is right, it is pure (holy, clean), it is lovely, it’s of a good report (good reputation), it is full of virtue (excellence) and worthy of praise (meaning, that which leans toward worship).

We must fix our minds upon the things of God. The SOURCE for discovering these things worthy of filling our minds is the Word of God. In other words, if we will fill our minds with the Words of God, there will be no room left for evil, no room for worry, no room for fear, no room for vengeance, no room for immorality, no room for confusion or trouble. A mind filled with the Word of God, and a mind led by the Word of God, is a stable, fortified, and strong mind!

So, if you want a stable, strong, and godly mind, the best place to get it done is with the Bible. We must take the initiative and challenge our mind to dwell on God’s Word and what it says, instead of allowing the mind to run toward evil, or gossip, or slander, or sexuality, or immorality, or other people and what they are doing, or even our problems. A mind saturated with Scripture and fixed upon the Word of God is a strong mind.

This is something that you have to do for yourself!

  • The church cannot strengthen your mind.
  • The church cannot keep you from dwelling on negative thoughts.
  • A Sunday School class or a small group cannot build a wall of protection around you.

No one is ever transformed when the motivation is external. Just like running a marathon, I can surround myself with encouragers cheering me on toward the finish line, but if I am not inwardly motivated to finish the race, I will give up, and will stop short.

The Christian life is very similar. If I am told what to do in order to grow spiritually yet fail to have the inward motivation of pleasing God in all that I do, or if I fail to walk in a manner worthy of being called a child of God, I WILL live a mediocre life.

How long will I be obedient to God if my motivation for Christianity is to avoid hell rather than loving and serving God out of a grateful heart and renewed mind? Strengthening your mind is something that YOU do to yourself, it is not something done TO you or FOR you. So, build the wall of PURITY.

  1. BUILD THE WALL OF PRACTICE (Philippians 4:9) – The things you have learned and received and heard and seen in me, practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you.

Do you notice how relational this verse is? Sometimes we think it reads, “If you want the peace of God, do the things I taught you.” This is not like a class or a sermon where we take notes; it involves walking through this life with other people. The Christian faith is caught more than it is taught. We grow and live within a faith community.

Paul tells the Philippians to practice the things they had seen and heard in his life. For us, it’s NOT that we have it all together, like we’re perfect in this life. Perfection is a goal, because it will never happen this side of heaven.

You’ve heard the phrase, “Practice makes perfect?” Well, that statement is wrong. If you practice it wrong, you will NOT get it right. Ask any musician. The real truth is in a modified phrase, “Practice makes permanent.” As you practice the rift on the guitar or the violin, you may start out slow, even at half speed, but you HAVE to get it right before you practice, practice, and practice some more. If you learn it wrong, you will always play it wrong.

If you want permanent change in your life, you may start out slowly, but the more you practice it under the accountability of a trusted mentor or friend, the more permanent the transformation will become.

So, we have spent the past few minutes building walls in order to strengthen our minds:

  1. THE WALL OF PRAISE (Philippians 4:4)
  2. THE WALL OF PATIENCE (Philippians 4:5)
  3. THE WALL OF PRAYER (Philippians 4:5b-7)
  4. THE WALL OF PURITY (Philippians 4:8)
  5. THE WALL OF PRACTICE (Philippians 4:9)

So, let’s have some time for reflection. Maybe bow your head in the quiet of this moment and let God’s Spirit speak to your heart and mind. What are your next steps?

NEXT STEPS: Consider these questions…

  1. Which wall is needed most in your life right now?
  2. Name a person who is spiritually mature that you will seek out this week to help you grow in that area.
  3. How will you begin to make changes in your life so you can strengthen your mind?
  4. WHO will you tell about this personal commitment, and the need for accountability?
  5. WHEN will you seek out this accountability person?

Your mind is a precious gift from God. It can be used for good or for evil, and all the forces of good and evil are battling for your mind all the time. Who wins the battle is always determined by YOU! No one can control your mind, but YOU. We are told in the Bible that we need to strengthen our mind, it is OUR job, individually, and it cannot be passed off to another person. We are in cooperation with the Holy Spirit to conform to the image of Christ. We can’t outsource that responsibility.

This is a very critical matter, because how you THINK determines how you will LIVE your life, Proverbs 23:7 (As a person thinks within himself, so is he, NASB). Until the mind is settled, all of life is out of control – remember the words of James 1:8. (a double-minded man is unstable in his ways), so I challenge you to strengthen your mind!

Let’s Pray About It: Lord Jesus, you know better than anyone that I need a stronger mind. I recognize that apart from you, I can do nothing, so please, help me to grow in my faith, renew my mind, and become more effective in my Christian walk. I confess my failures and seek your forgiveness. Lord, help me submit to your lordship, embrace your ways, and do your will.

Father, for those who have not yet begun their journey of discipleship, let them seek you earnestly, because your Word tells us that you WILL be found when we seek for you with all out heart.

Father, this time is yours. Help us to make commitments and give us the strength to follow through, especially when life get hard. We pray this in Jesus’ name, AMEN

CLOSING: Thank you for joining us today. If you made any commitments this morning, let us know about it. You can contact us using the church website (kgbc.us/more). Know that your staff prays for you, and we hope that you’ll make prayer for one another a regular activity each week.